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Is it too late to bond with my newborn?

I know how important it is to have skin to skin contact .. Breast feed and how important the first couple of days are. I expected to go to the hospital and be induced with Pitocin.. Delivery vaginally and then go home 24 hours later with my baby what I didn't expect was for her heart rate to drop below 100 and I'd need an emergency c-section with a blood transfusion because my doctor couldn't control the bleeding .. I also didn't expect to spend 4 days in the hospital and I definitely didn't expect this much pain! Now that we are home. I have barely done anything to help. I'm either on pain medicine and asleep or awake and she cries when I hold her Because even though she's not even 7 pounds yet it hurts to lift her so I have to hold her in weird positions.. I can't move fast enough to fix a bottle or to change her diaper. She seems so bonded with my mom. She even sleeps in her room at night. I know it's to give me a break but i miss my baby. I don't know when I'll feel better. I feel like I'm not being a loving parent to her because I can't really do anything for her. I need help cleaning my wound and even showering

4 Answers

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  • 5 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Our now 23 year old daughter was born 7 weeks premature and spend the first 2 1/2 weeks in an incubator in the hospital. We had no skin to skin contact at birth, and the nurses got to hold her more than I did. We slept miles away because I had to be discharged and go home, and she had to stay there.

    I didn't come home to be with my parents until I was 5 weeks old. They adopted me.

    All of us - our daughter and me, and my parents and I, have bonded just fine. You have *years* to bond with your daughter. Your daughter is not a duckling who needed to imprint on you. Infants can and do bond with all kinds of loving caregivers, but only *you* are her mama. Her one and only irreplaceable mama. : )

  • Pippin
    Lv 7
    5 years ago

    It's not too late to bond with your baby. (Some babies spend weeks/months in the NICU. In past eras, mothers spent a week or more in the hospital, and only saw their babies once or twice a day. Adoptive parents who don't see the baby for months or years bond with them.)

    But having said that, it would be wise to start making the effort to spend more time with and do more for your baby. For your sake and your baby's sake.

    Tell your mother that you no longer want baby to sleep in her room. That you want to start to work on breastfeeding. (Do you have help from an LC? At 7 days it's a challenge to get breastfeeding going, but with good help, it should definitely be possible.)

    If you already decided that you don't want to breastfeed, even if your mom MAKES the bottle, you can still feed the baby.

    And yeah, if your mom wants to help, that's what she should be doing -- making the bottles, doing the laundry, cooking the meals. Your job is to care for the baby.

  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    You'll bond fine. Stop worrying. Your tot won't remember you didn't tit feed and skin on skin contact. It'll still love you.

  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    Is it too late to bond with my newborn? Pray to John the Baptist. Pray to greatmartyr and healer Panteleimon. Pray to Grigorij "Novyj" Rasputin. If you cross your head (back of the head, front of the head, right temple, left temple), then the headache will go away. Plus blood is purified. To make upright perpendicular cross: using your right hand in the following way (picture below) cross yourself: touch firmly your forehead and say "In the name of the Father", touch firmly 1cm-2cm above belly button and say "and of the Son", touch firmly right shoulder (where 3 bones meet) and say "and of the Holy", touch firmly left shoulder (where 3 bones meet) and say "Spirit". Hand down: "Amen." Feet together.

    According to Vyacheslav Krasheninnikov, vodka dries one's brains. Smoking is censer for the devil. People who use drugs see demons who cleverly disguise themselves as aliens. Vaccines, IVs, tooth fillings, cosmetics, certain foods and drinks, medicaments, etc. contain nanochips and/or cells of aborted fetuses; intake of which leads to demon possession. If a dog is present in house or church, then the Holy Spirit will leave. Foul language calls upon Pagan deities (demons); Holy Spirit departs on seven meters. Blood contains sins; don't donate blood; don't accept blood transfusion yourself.

    Raw celandine (juice) cures cancer in minute amounts (like eating a leaf a day for 10 days, taking a break for 10 days, repeating three times); store this raw juice in dark glass container in a fridge for up to 2 or 3 years; add only hot water if you don't want to drink it cold; collect older celandine that is at least 20 meters away from the river from morning until 3 PM. Zodiac is planetary prison of demons; don't believe in horoscopes or you'll exhibit the traits of the trapped demons. Luck = Moloch = demon; don't wish people luck, please. Chanting mantras leads to demon possession; it's not the words that get you possessed; it's the rhythm. Meditation, hypnosis, astral projection, etc. lead to demon possession. Demons pretend to be ghosts and aliens. Barcode is Druid black magic curse. Most thoughts and dreams are from demons; demons never do good.

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    Stay away from cats because one can receive mark of the beast because of cats. Pray the Jesus prayer slowly all the time. Sleep fully clothed; also, pray to your guardian angel to have normal sleep. Dress appropriately for your gender. Women wear non-revealing dresses and head-scarfs tied at the front; no pants and no hats for women. Men wear pants and hats (outside only, except priests). Don't get any tattoos. Reject new documents and vaccines. Ask Orthodox Christian priest to bless your house. Get rid of all Occult stuff (ouija boards, talismans, amulets, barcodes, skulls, masks, astrology books, tarot cards, etc.). To break any curse, pray slowly the Psalm "The LORD is my light and my salvation" 40 times a day for 40 straight days. That's 1600 times in total. Forgive me.

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    http://vvedenskiy.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/c...

    https://vk.com/wall-25720730?q=%D1%80%D1%8F%D0%B7%...

    https://youtube.com/watch?v=0LUKFmZfOrs

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