I'm not good for him?

I'm not good for my boyfriend. We were friends for two years before we got together. When we did it was amazing at first. But I tend to really show how I feel when I'm close to someone. I've been depressed severely for about a decade now and nothing helps life is always the same for me no matter what and I'm just sick and tired of it. I've talked to a counselor but it didn't work she didn't give me any advice just listened to me. Most of the time life sucks for me especially at night. I feel like crap being so far away from home and my boyfriend. I cry every now and then I feel like punching a wall and most of all I'm irritable and I'm an angry person because it is that hard for me to deal with sometimes. I take it out on my boyfriend and he is tired of it. Because I'll sit and dwell on things for hours. Sometimes it's like I want to be mad or upset or sad because I just hate how I feel most of the time. I know what I'm doing to him but it's hard to change. Hard to not push someone away when you feel terrible most of the time. I'm a negative person and I'm self destructive in that way. Don't get me wrong I have happy moments. I'm happy with him especially in person. But in general I feel alone I don't have a lot of friends at this new school. Even if I put myself out there no one is interested or I lose contact with people. I care but then I don't care at the same time. I feel like he's better off without me, a nice girl close by but I don't want to give up to? Any ideas?