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My ex boyfriend added the guy I'm currently dating on facebook- what should I do?
I broke up with my ex boyfriend about 10 months ago, after we dated for 4 months. We've been broken up for literally more than twice the amount of time we were together. We had been friends before we started dating, as we went to high school together and had many mutual friends, and so after I broke up with him I tried to be friends with him still. He continued to pursue me even after breaking up with him. The last time I saw him was a few weeks ago at a bar and he was very drunk and trying to kiss me and saying inappropriate things to me and just making me very uncomfortable, so I left and I haven't spoken to him since.
So, that brings me to the point of my question. I recently started dating a really great guy who I met through my sister and would have had no contact with me or my high-school friends otherwise. I posted a picture of the two of us on Instagram a few days ago and so word got out about the two of us. Last night, my ex boyfriend added this guy I'm dating on facebook. He found it funny that my ex boyfriend is that petty, and I found it funny too until I started to think about why he would do that. He's obviously getting at something, but I don't know exactly what and I don't know whether to ignore it and not give him the attention he wants, or to call him out and tell him to stay out of my business. What do you think I should do?
2 Answers
- ?Lv 74 years ago
You both should block and ignore him. Your ex has already shown you that he doesn't respect your boundaries. He won't care if you or your boyfriend confront him, and he will have the satisfaction of knowing he got to you. But I don't think he's plotting against you. This probably is just petty jealousy and nothing will come of it. Freeze him out, don't give him another thought, and he will eventually move on.
- ?Lv 74 years ago
I'd ignore it.
I hope this new guy you're dating is a strong guy.
May I suggest that the first question to ask yourself when considering whether or not to date someone is, “Is this person a strong person?” If they’re not, no matter how much you like them, how much they like you, or how “cute” or “hot” they are, - please don’t date them. A strong person has good character (honesty, integrity, trustworthiness), displays a positive attitude (cheerful, caring, friendly, forgiving, helpful, and respectful), fulfills their responsibilities (for handling pains in a positive way, for always trying to make a good choice, for taking care of themselves, for serving others), gives their best effort, and demonstrates self-control (of their body, anger, tongue and money). A strong person isn't overly concerned with what weak people say, do, or think.
My suggestion is that you put in the effort necessary to become a strong person (if you’re not already), break up with this guy in a kind way unless he’s a strong person, and eventually look for this type of guy (otherwise you are setting yourself up for a broken heart). Unfortunately this type of man is difficult to find – but save yourself the heartache and don’t settle for less.
(Please remember that you eventually want a 50 or 60 year marriage - not a 5 or 10 year marriage.)
Hope this helps!
PS The best way to get to know a strong man without dating is to participate in the activities of a community service or a school organization.
Source(s): True Love Lasts - written with a character emphasis for teens through young adults, Straight Talk About Teen Dating - written with a Christian emphasis for ages 13-19, Straight Talk About Dating - written with a Christian emphasis for ages 20 and up