22 month old boy hitting his 4 month old brother (very hard) in the face. Is a 22 month old too young to understand consequences for bad?

HE NEEDS TO BE SPANKED

Just say no firmly and move him away. He's too young for consequences.

Being spoken to firmly means nothing to a 22 month old child. Nothing. It won't deter him in the slightest.

First, you need to protect your infant by knowing the infant's location at all times.

Next, every time the older child tries to harm the infant, he gets a fast trip to another location - for our girls it was a Pack 'n Play in another room where they were left by themselves for a few minutes.

It was only repeating this action a few times when they did something harmful that they learned that only thing they got out of disobedience was sitting alone.

Well the first thing here is to not leave him in a room with baby long enough for him to sneak up and hit. You clearly specify that is begins with the older child sneaking up. That's something you can usually avoid by not leaving the baby unattended. If baby is napping, secure the room so his brother can't sneak in. If you go to the bathroom, bring the bouncy seat in with you. Things like that. It obviously won't totally remove the issue, but it can greatly lessen it.

And of course, every time the older child does manage to hit the child, he has consequences. He's removed from the situation. He's put in isolation. At 22 months, that's just under two minutes. No attention during that time. When he is behaving, be sure to praise that. Also be sure the older child is getting his necessary one-on-one attention. It's tough, and you'll need someone to take the baby at times so you can focus all of your attention on the older child. But it's very common for the older child(ren) to act out when a baby is born because they're adjusting to all of Mom's attention switching to the baby. It isn't anything Mom is doing wrong, it just happens.

He's old enough to understand. He's doing what he wants because the other child is in the way. YOU have to teach him that there are consequences for his actions. You need to make sure the younger child is protected and that this doesn't happen.

That's the same age difference as between my kids, and my oldest was about that age when I started using timeouts for hitting. I was the one he hit, not his brother, but I probably would have handled it much the same way.

Empathy is not fully developed at this age, but a 22 month old can understand the link between actions and consequences. This is what I did:

When he hit me, I immediately picked him up and put him in his high chair facing the wall. I told him 'you hit mommy. Hitting hurts. Now you have to sit alone for a while.' Then I ignored him for 90 seconds. Which is longer than it sounds for a 22 month old.

Then I would go back and say 'I put you here because you hit mommy. Hitting hurts, we don't hit. I want you to say sorry.' Since he couldn't say the word yet, 'sorry' was a gentle stroke on the arm or head. Then we'd hug and get back to our day.

He hated the timeouts and pretty soon figured out how to avoid them. No more hitting.

He's not too young to understand consequences. He just doesn't care about the consequences he's experienced.

It is likely that the older child is jealous of the younger one. And hitting is VERY common at this age as well. a 22 month old is very capable of understanding consequences, but you'll have to figure out how you want to deliver them.

Timeout can be very effective for children, but only if they understand the concept of staying in one place for a period of time. If you have to constantly replace him in timeout, he is likely to see it as a game.

Instead of letting him sneak up on the baby, try to engage him in other activities so he is too distracted to notice the baby is there. When he DOES act this way, firmly tell him no and redirect him.

Yes, he's too young to understand. That's why he has parents or other adult caregivers--it's their job to teach him. As you have found out, words alone aren't going to work. There must be consequences (but not any violence like hitting!) Take away a privilege, like toys or TV. Ask your friends what disciplines work for them. This is urgent--he could permanently injure his brother. And btw, this is not normal behavior--where did he learn it from? Is someone he lives with violent? Right now, both these children are in danger, and someone might need to report them to Child Protective Services.

He is old enough to understand the consequences of his actions and he needs to be prevented from hitting his little brother.