If one spouse pays all bills does that spouse have a right to be mad if the other spouse's parents visit/mooch off of his/her money a lot?

It sounds like maybe it is time to make a rule that you host NOBODY at your house when people want to visit. So if her parents come, they can stay at a hotel. And if your parents come, they can stay at a hotel. Sounds like both sets of families can afford it, and if you make it a blanket household rule then she can't accuse you of favoritism. When she protests this (because she almost certainly will), you can tell her that you are simply uncomfortable hosting people in your space for weeks at a time, and that you are happy to get together and share meals with visitors, but you are not running a hotel or B&B and this needs to stop. Her responses should tell you a lot about her motivations.

Uh, well I would certainly think so. If I am giving away glasses of lemonade, do I not have the right to decide whom I give it to?

Here my advice

Sit down together and make a budget

Like ;;400 per month for groceries

gaz 190 a month

and put a certain amount of money for each expense

and agree that you will not go over the budget

and mention that even if you have visitors

this budget will be followed

unless they are at your place just for 2 meals

because no its not fair to pay for her parents expense

espcialy due to fact they are rich

I would say yes simply put you can be nice too your parents and the in-laws but when it becomes an all the time thing that is crossing the board in my opinion. Just because your husband may make good money and you guys are comfortable does not mean it is okay for your parents too come mooch all the time or always visiting and hanging out time to cut this cord.

If they are not pooling their money and handling it AS a couple . .then they are not really spouses. They are just roommates-with-benefits, even if there is a legal marriage contract registered at the Courthouse.

In other words . .this isn't going to work out anyway. Be as mad as you want.

But understand that actual spouses who DO make their marriage work do NOT use anger to try to get their way. They are emotionally-whole enough to face their own emotions, and work through them. And by the time they approach their spouse they are calm about the situation and ALSO see the situation from the other person's point of view ... focused on making it work rather than getting their own way.

Hope you know the name of a good divorce lawyer. Or a marriage counsellor. One of the two WILL be needed.

To clarify - my wife (of about 3 months) and I have lived together for just over two years. She is finishing up grad school getting her doctorate right now and I have paid all the rent as she has no income (we're in SoCal, so rent and utilities are about $2500/month). Her family continually comes to stay with us for multiple weeks at a time. Her parents make over $400,000 a year combined. I make less than $70,000. They have never offered to pay rent, don't pay for grocery or gas or dinners when they're here, etc, letting us foot the ball. Whenever my family visits (my parents make about $150,000 combined) they do offer to pay for groceries, gas, dinners, etc. My wife gets mad at me when my family pays. She defends that her family shouldn't have to pay. It has become a major point of contention for us. I tell her not to ask her family for money, but I also tell her it bothers me that they don't offer to pay anything. She gets angry at me for "bashing on her family just because they're different than mine." Also, twice one of her family members (her brother) has been visiting at the same time as one of mine (friend, sister) and she has insisted her brother get the bedroom and my friend and sister sleep on the couch. Am I in the wrong trying to stand up for myself? I feel like they're taking advantage of the situation, and me. I am not one to be rolled over so I tell her how I feel about the issue. Is it wrong of me to not just bite the bullet here? Thanks in advance for any advice you can give me.