How to smoke inside without the smell?

When smoking was more common than it is now and people had house parties, often the hostess would put out saucers of vinegar to absorb some of the smoke.

Don't light the cigarette. 

A non smoker will still pick up the smell days later, no way to totally remove it. Hell even outside it gets on ones cloths and then that smell transfers inside to whatever those cloths come in contact with. As a smoker, that only smokes outside, i can still smell it on others and such.

By using a sophisticated apparatus of pulleys, ropes, winches and crampons you should be able to suspend yourself out of the window at a distance which ensures others cannot smell your foul habit.

Smoke outside the house.

Air travels around your home. No room is air tight. And you have vents in your room. Smoke sticks to everything, curtains, walls, bedding, hair, clothes. There is no way they won’t smell it.

I can smell it on my friend when she comes back in rom smoking outside, 

I used to LOVE to smoke. And drink coffee with a cig.  Besides being really bad vor you, it's mostly poor and uneducated people that smoke now.  If you look at smoking places at work, it's almost all poor, not-smart people there.  Standin' in the cold with umbrellas when it rains.   You'll NEVER see a company owner or general mgr smokin'  So who did I wanna spend my breaks with?  Dumb poor people or the owner?   There ARE some incredibly good blue collar, underpaid smokers.  It ain't that they're "bad" people.

You can't. The smoke sticks to everything it comes in contact with. No sprays, candles or other things will fully disguise it. Everyone should smoke outside, no matter how cold it is. 

Go smoke outside! That's what respectful people do anyway.