Ancient Mariner

I am worried. I have crossed the path of a Black Dog many times since moving into a house with my girlfriend/wife who owns a black dog. Am I cursed? I know that people are cursed by crossing paths of Black Cats,.. why not Black Dogs?

I am wanting some good ideas of what should be deep fried. In the past state fairs have seen wonderful ideas such as oreos, twinkies, candy bars, and cookie dough deep fried. Do you have an idea?

I want to make curtains & pillow cases for my house. Also make alterations to clothes. What would you recommend?

How do I keep Racoons from ripping up the shingles on my mobile home's roof. I have this massive pecan tree, and the Racoons keep climbing down at night and messing with my trailer. One of these days Im gonna be starin up at night to a big hol ein the roof with a racoon coming down. Should I get a shotgun, coon dog, or hire Earl from the oil change place to do it? Y'all got any other solutions?

Last night my girlfriends friends took her phone away from her, and starting a lot of vicious messages to me. I didn't think I was msging her, but I was really pissed. Should I stay mad at her for allowing it to happen, or forget about it?

Lets say you are single and desirable guy, who wants to have kids someday (no telling how many). You meet a woman with kids - how many kids is too many kids for your girlfriend to have? What do you think?

I'm considering buying one of these - I've never messed with any of them. Is there any advantage to any of them?