ManInTheMoon

Hey Gang, It's Been Sometime Since I've Been Here, I Return In Need Of Your Input So As I May Find A Final Decision. Less Than Two Days Ago My A-Mom Contacted Me & Informed Me That My B-Mom Wishes To See Me, As She Most Likely Will Not Live Through The Years End. I Am Filled With A River Or Two Of Emotions !

Let Me Refresh You Now, This Request Comes From The Very Same Woman That Let Me Know She Never Intended Nor Wanted Any Type Of Relationship With Me. Then Preceded To Rant That I Would Only Ruin Her Marriage & How Her Husband Could Never Know Of Me. I Was 33yo Then & Soon To Be 50yo Now, I Had Thought I'd Come Along Way Since Then & Put It Behind Me, Getting On With My Life. I Know & Believe That One Cannot Begin To Heal Until He First Learns To Foregive & I Thought I Had Foregiven. Again I Feel The Hurt, Anger, Rejection, & Emotions Comming Forth Only Influencing The Decision I Must Make Sooner Than Later. Knowing That Death Is Final I Do Find Compassion Within, Yet There Is Also A Part Within Me That Feels I Owe Her Nothing & Why Should I Care, She Didn't !

So I Ask, "What Would You Do If You Were In My Shoes ?"

I Would Greatly Appreciate Hearing From All Sides Of The Adoption Triangle, Again Thanks For Your Input & Possibly Opening My Eyes To See Another Side !

"God's Speed !!!"

As I Just Came Back From Shutting The World Out For The Last Couple Of Days, (You Know The Dark & Lonely Spaces In Your Mind Filled With Demons & Ugliness). I'm Curious As To What Tools Or Methods You May Use To Help Pull Yourself Out & Come Back To The Sunshine's Of Life ?

I Was Appauled By The Conversation I Was Over Hearing Between A Mother & Daughter, While I Was Waiting In Line At The Grocery Store Today. A Woman (70ish) Asked, "Do You Know The Ages Of The Children Coming To Live With Us Yet?". "No Mom, I Already Told You Their Ages / Boys Or Girls Makes No Difference!" Replied The Daughter (late50s) & Finished With, "We Just Need Social Service To Place Them Soon If We're Going To Make This Months House Payment!" Realizing Others Were Listening To Their Conversation, Both Became Silent.

As I Walked To My Car, I Saw The Women In Their Car, & Wrote Down The License Plate Number.

I Just Feel Somethings Not Right About The Whole Incident.

Am I Over Reacting & Making Something Out Of Nothing?

Was I Out Of Line To Listen In On Their Conversation?

Not Thinking I"m Better Than, Nor Looking Down Upon These Women, I Wouldn't Want Them To Care For My Children After The Fact.

Lastly, In The Best Interest Of Any Child, If These Women Are Legitimate, Should I Not Call & Mention It To Social Services Or Child Welfare?

If It Was Possible To Be In A Spaceship & Be Moving At The Speed Of Light, & At Some Point You Were To Turn On The "Head Lights" On The Spaceship. Would The "Light" Ever Project Out In Front Of The Spaceship To Be Seen? For If You're Already Moving At The Speed Of Light When The Head Lights Are Turned On, How Could The Light Project Ahead?

. My Adoptive Mother Worked As A Social Services Worker & Juvenile Probation Officer In The Years Prior To & Right Up To The Time Of My Adoption. Ever Since I Can Remember, She Has Always Been Very Open With Me About My Adoption. So Much So, As To Let Me Know She Was The Social Worker For The Woman Whom Was My Incubator. In Fact, She Even Drove This Woman To The Hospital For My Delivery, & Then Sat With Her 3 1\2 y.o. Daughter Until A Relative Could Arrive To Get Her. (Hmmm, My Sister Maybe)

I'm Just Curious If Others Feel, As I Do, That Some Lines Were Obviously Crossed To Achieve Personal Gain. I Doubt Very Much That Any County, City, Or State Would Tolerate With This Action, This Day Of Age.

Conflict Of Interest / Immoral Conduct / Practices Unbecoming ?