?

Calmly chaotic and rather psychotic

Trying to navigate

this modern society.

Full of trauma

in all its variety.

Asking myself

how to find home

with strangers

undertone, I'm alone!

Stealing, lying, cheating,

poor old grandmama.

Would running away

be better by far?

Gotta get that roof

over her silly head.

God knows she needs

to sleep in a bed!

Shyly reclusive

must evolve.

Personality

isn't resolve.

Shut down the smile

and do not speak

because life is nasty

for a bipolar freak.

Take the meds,

just sleep and eat.

I've given up!

Accepted defeat!

One little Angel

flew down from

the very top of the tree

and softly landed

tiptoeing around

upon the edge of my knee!

"Don't cry" she said

with a rosebud smile,

"Angels never forget!"

With tiny white feathers

this magical creature

dried my teardrops of regret.

I never grew up!

Always imagining,

giggling and trying

to enjoy everyday ...

But they did!

The children grew up,

so alone beside a tree

is the price I must pay.

Couldn't give them houses

cars or every single thing

their little darling hearts

did so dearly desire ..

Love doesn't add up!

Love isn't sharing a cup,

nor does it create Empathy!

Love only made me a liar!

Lingering laughter

of children echoes

hauntingly but it's gone!

Christmas morning,

Easter egg hunt,

Mothers day, the sun shone.

Alone on Christmas day ...

I guess lonely is here to stay!

Adults no longer ask to play.

Parenthood's evolving way.

Grandma's don't equal much!

I miss my little kids touch!

Where do you softly cry?

When secretly asking why?

Who hears the humblest sigh?

If ever your heart feels it might die?

What place exists?

My mind resists!

Can I make visits?

Is it only within mists?

Do you write it all down?

Scribbling with a frown?

Are Angels kissing your crown?

Or do you openly cry in your town?