polite gardener

I have way too many plants, I eat a minimum of 20 stalks a day, mostly for breakfast. Are there any bad effects from eating too many of these tasty beauties?

My longhair Persian cat is starting to get lumps in her hair, I can't keep up with the brushing. She's a really hairy thing. Can I get her shaved like a sheep for the summer? Is this a bad thing? I don't know.

My first inclination was to kill him, that would cause more family hardship and is apparently illegal. He has been molesting my niece (not his daughter, he claims in justification) since she was seven, she is fifteen now. She's a bundle of damaged goods. His wife asked me to keep quiet, not kill him while she works this treacherous betrayal out in her heart. There are younger children in the household (unmolested, his children) and would appreciate any input before I do the right thing.

I planted a buttload of these four, maybe five years ago and let them go, ignored them except for water. This year I will eat them Yummy. I have 60 or more spears poking their little nose out. Should I harvest all of them or let some go? What size is too big, small? The local food bank will be happy with all I can give but I don't want to over harvest. Any tips?

Strange little program inserted so that I can't post, read or reply to any questions. Curious.

From reading Patrick O'brian and Bernard Cornwell I see that marines were allowed a certain number of unregistered women, prostitutes were very often aboard. Dudley Pope made reference in "Life in Nelson's Navy". Anyone know other good reference books to give me vicarious thrills?

I lost two maple trees last year (lightning) and had the brush munched up into bite sized chunks. I spread several tons of this into a garden, let it sit overwinter. Two days of tilling to 18 inches deep and it is more maple chunk than soil. Did I put too much down into this garden? I'm an escaped city boy and a three acre plot is all new to me. What problems can I expect in this garden? I have two others if I messed this one up too much.

Thanks for previous answers, all helpful. Now this: My plan is to spread a small amount of fungicide over the whole garden, till it in. Garden is 75ft X 35ft. Next I will burn the winter damaged wood and brush over the corner I used for tomatoes, till in the ash. Next, another treatment with fungicide. This seems fairly aggressive to me, anyone have Ideas or suggestions? I'm not afraid of extra work if you can think of anything.

I lost a lot of tomatoes from this nasty disease. Can I grow tomatoes this year or do I need to treat the soil? What is good for this? I am not afraid of "non-organic" stuff. Do I need fungicide? Herbicide? I cannot burn the soil, I have asparagus all over.