Angea

I'm in a team where most of the regular staff don't like me. I am pretty sure the temps (on temp work contract) like me. I hang out with them at work the most.

Usually being disliked wouldn't bother me but it bothers my managers because they strongly believe I have to put my best efforts in befriending everyone of the regulars in order to have a efficient team. However they don't plan to do anything to help achieve that.

When I mention how I am in good terms with the temps, one of my managers say, "you must understand the temps won't be here for long". I felt a bit insulted for myself and for the temps. It felt like my friendship with them meant nothing to the managers.

Do I turn on a mask and just please the people who don't like me? I am sure they would be able to tell it is fake and dislike me even more but it would help to show the managers that I tried.

I am still in a job contract so I can't just leave the job.

As for why people don't like me. From what I observed, the regulars (mostly women in 40s) prefer submissive girls a bit like damsels who won't show serious or negative emotions unless thru jokingly or by flirting gestures. They don't like no-nonsense tone or words and hates questioning (they prefer me to just shut up and follow procedures we all know are stupid/redundant).

I am fortunate I still have the temps for now.

A lot of people would tell me to just ignore it. It is never that simple when you can't leave the environment (cos of contract) and they are the highly valued/favored people of the company. If you watched The Devil Wears Prada before, you'd know what I mean.

Is there no way we can make such jerks taste their own poison?

In our current society, very few people bother to stand up for others. Humanity just gets worse in our modern society.

How would you handle it if it happens to you?

I am thinking about recording myself standing next to a monitor that s playing a show I just watched. I won t be playing the whole thing. My plan is to fast-forward till I reach some areas I want to rant about, and I would be circling and touching my monitor with my fingers to draw attention to what I want the audience to notice. I don t know if this would be fine with the content owners, especially those who ignore the existence of fair use. What do you think?

Come to think of it, I wonder why youtube channels like CinemaSins doesn t seem to have that problem (having copyright owners after them), or maybe they have but they manage to get them off somehow.

I'm thinking of a story where the female lead is a 36 year old woman who shuns moves made by men who are already in a serious romantic relationship because she despises cheating.

The question I have is, is it possible in real life that some women would attract married/engaged men but not single men?

'Lua' is pronounced 'Lu-ah'

I'm leaning towards Lena Lua if I can't find a better one.

My given name doesn't sound good in English pronunciation. It also sounds a bit masculine (I'm a girl). Think about the pronunciation of the most famous Korean names you know and you'd get what I mean.

I am starting a new job soon. Do you think it would be a good idea to give myself a friendlier easy-to-pronounce name at work? Would it make me look pretentious?

I'm not talking about dumping your emotional problems to a friend, but an exchange of some amounts, along with hugs and encouragement that things would get better.

It seems more and more people feel they have no one to talk to, or they feel their friends are too busy to listen to their problems. It would be really sad if friends can only share good times and avoid talking abt anything bad or discouraging.

I ll give you some examples.

Me: I think I m getting fatter

Friend: Just slim yourself down

Me: I need customizable racks in certain dimensions but I can t find them in any major furniture store here.

Friend: Just buy them online

Me: Where?

Friend: I don t know.

Me: I need some new formal clothes but it s difficult to find good ones in my size.

Friend: Just buy whatever that fits.

Guys tend to complain that girls don t tell them their requests and intentions directly. However does directness really help?

I ll give you an example. I was having a conversation with a guy friend abt AC maintenance services and I was shocked to learn that some stuff that should be checked are not included. Our conversation becomes like this:

Me: "This makes me mad. How can they do this?"

Him: "That s just the way it is."

Me: "I m mad. I can t think straight. I need to calm down. Calm me down"

Him: "There s no need to. You just need to accept what you looking for isn t included in the maintenance"

Me: "I know! I believe what you said! However I am still mad! Calm me down. Talk abt something else. Please!"

Him: "No need to. You just need to open your mind."

Me: (-_-) (What the hell does that even mean?)

I have had conversations like this with different guy friends. I am sure there are guys who are more empathetic but they seem to be few. If guys generally behave like my friends would, why are they complaining girls don t tell them things directly, when telling them things directly won t help them help us either?

The incident was reported in news today. A lady was hanging from a window from her 11th floor apartment before she lost her grip and fell. One man tried to save her by reaching out to catch her but the impact was too great. She didn't survive and the impact broke the man's limbs.

I was thinking. In such a situation, would tackling her falling body, i.e. horizontal push, help diffuse the impact? I am not good at physics hence I don't know how to calculate this.

Thank you for your time.

My birthday is important to me. I know some people don't feel that way but I do. In fact it is one of the few events that I care about.

For some years some friends came up with the idea that they can celebrate my birthday with another girl's birthday together. They would pick a date that's neither her birth date nor mine. It's convenient to them you see.

Money isn't the problem. I am only asking for a meal together and we are all working adults.

However they do it year after year and I am getting weary. The other girl didn't mind because she doesn't really care about birthdays. Honestly I don't know nor like that girl much. Year after year I have to pretend I am alright with it. I mean, who am I to spoil their plans when they bothered to include me?

I remember telling one of the guys abt this but he doesn't seem to understand. I don't know what to say to get it thru.

What would you reply when they say 'I don't see why you're so glum abt it. Celebrating together is fun!' and they don't understand it's not fun to me?

Oh by the way, even though it is a joint birthday, they would pick things leaning toward the other girl's preference, cos well, I am the easy going one so they feel they don't have to ask me.

I have a couple of friends whose way of dealing with me when they upset me is to keep quiet and not respond. I have known them for some years. They would do things like forget my birthday, didn t include me in a movie, etc. I am starting to feel they are not friends any more but more like friendly backups when they need some company and nobody else was available. How do I give them up though? I am a sentimental person and it is hard to purposely drift away.

English is one of the primary languages used in my country. However a lot of us are not proficient in it. I struggle when I have to say/write something like these:

Example 1

The phone I bought last year is more expensive than this phone.

or

The phone I bought last year was more expensive than this phone.

You see, the former phone IS still more expensive but since I am describing something in the past, it feels like Was is more appropriate. How do I tell which to use?

Example 2:

Chopped almonds is my favorite ice cream topping.

or

Chopped almonds are my favorite ice cream topping.

Here I am trying to say which topping is my favorite, which is why I believe Chopped almonds is... sounds correct. However chopped almonds are plural noun hence it feels like chopped almonds are... is more appropriate. Do you see why this is difficult for me?

I ve tried to better my English via external courses but I still couldn t grasp a lot of the rules and exceptions.

Is English a language most of us will not be able to truly master in our lives? Should we ignore grammar nazis when they pick at us in informal forums and chats?

When I see cyber-bullying or trash talk from kids, I see lack of manners, rage and insecurity. Are parents turning a blind eye towards these behaviors or are they not present in their kids lives enough?

It is happening in my own local community already. Some kids don t apologise for the wrong they do. Let s say they bumped into an old frail lady and knocked her down, they would just ran off like nothing happened. Their parents who were right there pretended they didn t see a thing.

Aren t parents afraid their lack of discipline for their children would bite them in the butt in future?

I found by chance that multi-vitamins help me curb cravings. I am an emotional eater and I give in to sweets easily. I don't overdose on it of course. One pill a day at the most. It dawned on me that no doctor had ever suggest to try that. They suggest the usual 'drink more water before you eat so that you would eat less' but that's it.

This happened over a decade ago. A new guy came to my class during my 2nd year. His name is Shyan. I noticed a mixture of floral and vanilla fragrance from him and was interested to buy it for myself. When I asked him about his perfume, he replied he wasn't wearing any. I thought he was joking and didn't pursue further.

One day we were in a lecture hall when he walked by with the same fragrance. I asked my friends whether they know the name of the perfume. They were puzzled and replied they didn't smell anything.

During lunch time on the same day my friends tried to take the matter off my mind by saying maybe he was playing a game or wearing some floral gel in his hair.

Shyan went to a different course and I didn't see him again.

I thought I had made my peace until I smelled a similar fragrance at temp work. To my delight, the girl said she was wearing Happy (perfume from Clinique).

I went to find and try Happy. It's similar but not the same. I know this because during graduation ceremony the same fragrance re-emerged. I turned around, and there he was! I asked Shyan one last time but he insisted that he wasn't wearing perfume.

It only happens with him hence I don't have a brain disorder. It's a shame there is no way to get the truth. I don't see why he would want to lie over 2 years.

Not knowing the truth bothers me from time to time. It's like having a trip in space but can't bring proof back.

I was at a fast food place that sells pasta and soup. I was leaving the counter when the cashier said 'the soup is not very warm, I hope it's ok' I didn't want to hold up the line and make them warm up my soup hence I replied 'it's alright' but frowned at the cashier because I was disappointed.

Is my reaction considered rude or acceptable?