I was suppose to be in my friends wedding?

You owe her nothing!. She wasn't being a good friend in the first place if she could not agree to your payment plan, and also bad mouthing you to your other friends. Tell her to sell the dress to get her money back. Don't give her one cent for it!. They say..'you always can tell who your true friends are'.

Point No.1 The dress she picked out was way way more than you could afford & she knew this."She knew what about you" Did you clearly refuse "DON'T BUY I CAN NOT AFFORD?" I don't think so.

Point No.2 You told her you would have to make payments.

Even if you didn't give any certain amounts or time frame on the payments. But did you clearly said " I WILL NOT PAY YOU?"

THE ONLY PROBLEM IS YOU WENT WITH HER. WHICH SHOWS YOUR INTENTION OF SHOPPING. THEN YOU MADE A STATEMENT THAT YOU WILL HAVE TO MAKE PAYMENTS THOUGH YOU DID NOT GIVE ANY CERTAIN AMOUNT OR TIME FRAME.

I think if this case goes in to court you will have to pay even you use dress or not.

BUT BEING A FRIEND SHE MUST KNOW THAT YOU CAN NOT AFFORD A COSTLY DRESS EVEN FOR HER WEDDING THEREFORE SHOULD NOT PICK SUCH A COSTLY DRESS IF SHE IS A REAL FRIEND.

If I am a judge(which I am not)I will say pay 50% to both.

Hope this will resolve this problem if not don't get angry.

From a legal perspective, I don't see that there was a verbal contract. She was basically trying to sell you the dress and you declined. You didn't make any payment and you told her that you didn't want it. So, that would indicate that you didn't accept the agreement.

Hopefully this ugly scene will go away. Can she return the dress. Did someone else where it at the wedding? Can the friendship be salvaged.

If she keeps demanding payment, tell her to take you to small claims court. I am certain that you will prevail.

You dont owe her anything. She asked you to be in the wedding not the other way around. She should have asked you about your price range on dresses, since you would have to pay for it. She isnt being a very good friend, so dont worry to much about it, you really dont need friends like that anyway!

poor you - what an awful situation to be in. I don't think you owe her anything for the dress, she should either find someone else to wear it or sell it to get her money back! It would have made sense for her to agree to a payment plan with you, particulary as you say she was aware the dress was too expensive for you. People often seem to behave very irrationally when it comes to weddings, maybe it woule be worth contacting her and talking to her about it, tell her that you care about her and want to be involved in her wedding but that you feel hurt about how she has treated you. If you can't talk to her try writing. And remember, this is sbout one of the most important days of her life, she badly wants everything to be perfect and this is maybe affecting her behaviour, be patient with her, but also let her know how you feel - Good Luck!!

You don't owe her anything. You never wore the dress and she may take it back and get the money herself. By the way: I thought the bride pays for all the dresses... why would have you paid for it? Besides she did not behave correctly by bad mouthing you.

I think the most important question is, at the time she ordered the dress, did you and she believe you were going to pay for the dress?

If she ordered it, based on the belief that you were going to pay for it (somehow, even over time), it would be the right thing to do to pay for it. It's like saying, "hey, you buy this for me, and I'll pay you back over time." You just took out a loan from your friend, and you should repay. (Note: this even applies if you did not *explicitly* say you were going to pay for the dress -- for example, if you said you would pay over time, and you gave her your measurements for the dress, that indicates that you want the dress and you will pay for it.)

If she ordered it, but you had not agreed to pay for it. (Like, if she ordered it after you said you weren't going to be in the wedding) Then she's the one who took the risk, and she should not expect you to pay.

Since you say you told her you would have to make payments, I believe that indicates that you agreed to pay for the dress. You have an obligation to pay her (sorry, I know this is not what you want to hear).

All that being said, I'm surprised she is actually asking you for the money. The gracious thing to do would be to let it go, especially knowing it would cause you financial hardship. Also, if she knew she was the one who caused you not to be in the wedding (by bad mouthing her), then she should feel like you shouldn't have to pay for the dress. It's sad that she doesn't feel that way.

But the stand-up thing to do would be to pay for it. And you should get the dress. If she wants to keep the dress, she should pay for it. If someone has already worn it, they should pay for it.

Sorry that you and your friend had a falling out. And sorry that she wasn't sensitive enough to choose a less expensive dress or offer to pay for some/all of it. Sorry she bad mouthed you. It's so sad that this happens around weddings. Seems like a friend good enough to be in your wedding shouldn't be worth losing over a dress.

By the way, to all of you who think the bride should pay for the bridesmaid dresses, I have never heard of that being an expectation. In fact, I have only heard personally heard of one bride who has done it (and that is me). I have been a bridesmaid at 9 weddings, and it's always been the expectation that the bridesmaid pays for her own dress, shoes, lodging, etc.

And, to those of you having a wedding, thinking of what kind of dress to ask your bridesmaids to wear, please be considerate of their financial situation and pick something they can afford (even if it's wearing a dress they already have or can borrow), or offer to help them pay for it!

Okay, I really got on a soap box there. Sorry. I hate to see all this cr*p get in the way of what should be a time when love and friendship are celebrated.

Would u have been a bridesmaid? Then if she picked out the dress - she should pay for it! It's part of the costs towards having a wedding. She can't expect you to pay for it! She's being selfish - who needs friends like that?

sorry to hear that you are going thru that. she is not a true friend if she was bad mouthing you to your friends. that is not what a good friend does. and no, i do not believe you owe her anything. especially if you never wore it or paid anything on it. she can very easily sell it on ebay or by some other means. just take it one day at a time. don't worry about it! it will all work out! and also, if she was a true friend she would and would have understood your situation.

NO and NO

if she did not agree with the arrangement then she shouldn't have bought the dress in the first place. all of her 'bad mouthing you' about it just shows that she does not agree with the arrangment so in my opinion she owns an extra dress and you owe her nothing