What do you think?

I can see your point.

I know i would feel exactly the same as you do, and part of me would think 'no way, you cheeky thing!'

And the other part would make me want to show her what a good friend i am, and how she should be.

It depends on how you want to be seen, you could do it and drop a comment in while you are there, such as 'maybe you could come see my kids as its been a long time, and i would love you to meet my youngest'

She might then think to herself, Oh my God what a naff friend i have been.

Up to you, but i think deep down your friend is more important to you than an argument.

I'm in agreement that two wrongs do not make a right. The real question is...do you feel like she is reaching out to you? Maybe she wants to rekindle your relationship and just misses you. Maybe the way to go is to give her a second chance. Find a sitter, you could probably use the break anyway, and go check it out. Your heart will know the answers once you really investigate. If she has children of her own...she would understand that you cannot just "drop" everything. Easier said than done. If she was a close friend at one time and your desire is to become close again then I say try.

I think the baby shower is a pretext. There is something else going on. Have you talked on the phone? You are right in that this seems to have become a distant friendship and things happening out of the blue seems a bit inappropriate.But, as I said , I think ther's something underneath this request. Go Well.

No! I would feel the same way...it sounds like she is really just using the friendship to get her needs met. Personally, I think it's weird that She would ask you to do it...usually, it's the other way around. Just more confirmation that she is using the friendship. I would confront her about it in as nice and gentle a way as possible. Explain your feelings to her. If she really cares about you, then she will be open to that. If she gets really defensive, it's probably because she knows your right. Being a good friend doesnt mean you have to let your "friends" take advantage of you.

Kinda of tricky. I understand your point but I think the saying is 2 wrongs don't make a right. If you can have the shower for her then tell her how you want to keep in contact more. When she has her own child she may then understand this.

i would say that your feeling are totally justified. if your friend cant be bothered with your kids then i wouldnt be making the effort to do anything about a baby shower for her. you have your hands full with two children...dont bother making the trouble for yourself...

ask her to do something for you and see what happens. i wouldn't waste my time on her. i just think she has no friends to do that for her and if you went the distance you would be hurt by her.

YES on all questions that you had asked.

do exactly the same as she has done for you - namely bugger all. (and dont feel guilty - its karma)

send her a card-