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When you leave your church because it doesn't 'fit' you, how and where do you start looking for a new one?

If you left your church, how do you know where to go next? I do not want answers telling me what religion to try next. I would like to know how someone knows which direction to go in. Thanks.

Update:

Why does it have to be fishy? If there is something missing for you, why stay?

17 Answers

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  • Gail R
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Well, when I got ready to leave my former church, I felt I had to. The Holy Spirit was leading me in that direction. It wasn't because of any mess going on or anything. The Lord just wanted to take me higher and I knew there had to be more to my living for Christ, than what I was being taught...which was nothing. I prayed and God let me to where I am now. Just pray about it, be still and wait on an answer.

  • JohnC
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    The first thing I would do is list the reasons you left your previous church and also list the things you believe; your personal statement of faith. This will give you a better idea on what you're looking for or what you don't want in a church.

    Next, I would grab a phone book and make a list of churches in your area you might be interested in. The first thing I would do after I got a list of churches is to find out what they believe. What is their statement of faith? Many churches have web sites where you can get this info and if they don't then I would call and ask for their pastor/priest, or whatever, and get the info straight from them.

    After you look at the statement of faith and you are in agreement you can ask how the service is run. In addition to other things like: day care service, service schedules, Do you like the church leaders?, Do you feel comfortable in the church? Does family and friends go to this church? The list is endless. Once you have that information you can usually whittle it down to a few churches that may be a good match for you.

    The next step is just going to these churches. I would attend each of these churches even if you found one you really enjoy. I would give them all a good "look." By the end of your search you will know exactly which one is right for you.

    I'm doing the same thing right now (looking for a church) and this is how I went about it. The very first thing I did was re-read the bible to find out exactly what I believe. Then I made my own "statement of faith." Next, I found out what else I wanted in a church. I researched the churches I was interested in and I've narrowed the list down. The last thing is to actually go to the churches. It is not a light decision as some like to make it out to be. Many people put more thought into buying a car then they do picking a church. God Bless you a fruitful search.

  • 1 decade ago

    They say it takes two to tango. I believe it goes the same when making a choice. You do not chose a religion if it fits you only because you will find yourself in a situtation where the church will also think if you will fit into theirs. Religion is not like a line of accessories that you have to see which one is the best to fit you. As there are clothes fit to any size, religions also welcome everyone with open heart and mind. It is always the person who makes the better of himself not the religion. Just consider this, if you find the practices leading to suppress your freedom and to you it seems to be leaning as a cult and claim that theirs is better than the rest, think of it well. Each religion should be open to the reality that their existence is like one of the many roads a person has to walk through. Of course there are straight paths and there are those that are winding roads to spirituality but all in the end will meets to the same point. Do not believe those claiming they the only way to heaven in fact, you do not need anyone of them if that is their claim. Live righteously and mercifully towards those in need. Give yourself a reflection often if what you did for the day is worth the smile for yourself and to your love ones. Your prayer is not necessarily on bent knee for longer hours and repeated words of sorry for the guilts planted in your brain but rather for enjoying and dedicating every second of what you are honestly doing and learning from every mistake you do.

    Be careful for the one who claim he is the way, the truth and the life because the truth is you are the one responsible in walking through the right way, your truth is what God would like to see in you and your life is the life He gave you that only you have the responsibility to nurture it and make it worthy be Holy because He is Holy. Do not live on guilt but rather ask for forgiveness and then live in His commandments. Do not be afraid to make mistake instead standup and correct it and try your best not to make the same fault. I have no religion at the moment. I only believe in One God and He is the God I learned from the Old Testament. He did not say any particular religion even if he is the God of the Jews though I have no wish to become a Jew.

  • 1 decade ago

    Jesus told Peter that through Peter that Jesus would build His church (not churches). Matthew 16:13-19, verse 18, "And I also say to you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build My church, and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it." Jesus went on to say in verse 28, "Assuredly, I say to you, there are some standing here who shall not taste death till they see the Son of Man coming in His kingdom." His Church.

    As someone has already answered, in 1Corinthians 1:10, "Now I plead with you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment."

    In Romans 16:17, "Now I urge you, brethren, note those who cause division and offenses, contrary to the doctrine which you learned, and avoid them."

    Search the scriptures to see who follows what the Bible teaches.

    Source(s): Bible
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  • wisdom
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    I understand exactly what you are saying, my husband and I have had to leave numerous churches because they did things that went against scripture. We usually pray and ask God to led us and he always does.

    We recently left one church because of the way some of the praise and worship team dressed, like they were "ladies of the evening" if you know what I mean. They had no business being part of the praise and worship team dressed like hookers. We had to leave one church because they had statues in the church. Thou shalt make NO GRAVEN IMAGE FOR YOURSELVES. etc. etc. God has lead us every time. Sometimes we have to confront the ppl that do these things and tell them they are wrong, but we don't do that unless we are compelled by the Lord to do so.

  • cork
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    I have what we call "HOME CHURCH". One we attend each Sunday ect...Member you can call it.

    However we attend many Churches--revivals-homecoming-funerals-fall and spring festivals.

    So I know "if" we had to leave our church __people and pastors change. I know we already have several others already we go to

    on a regular bases.

    This week alone from Sunday to Sunday we have fall revival- we attend 7 churches in 7 days...(night services) and close revival at our home church (so 8 with ours)

    You get a good feel how others get along and style of service..

    no two churches are alike as pastor and people are different.

    hopefullly the message is....

  • 1 decade ago

    I can understand completely where you are coming from. I would try the same kind of church just different location. For instance, I was raised southern baptist, went to freewill baptist, and then to another baptist church. I had a hard time finding a fit too. I have been to Methodist churches, Assembly of God, Lighthouse, and I never felt comfortable.

    Good luck. I hope you find one you like.

  • 1 decade ago

    religion.??

    All religion is 'Man - manifested'. It is a way of controlling the masses through guilt. All religion puts GUILT on all of it's followers.

    You can be more rightous just by being Honest, Trustworthy, and Loyal.

    Governments of the world are no different. They all have an agenda to enslave us.

    Once you realise how blind you are, it's remarkably easy to SEE through the fog of deceit.

    Check out 'The universal Soldier' below.

    Good luck, Pete.

  • 1 decade ago

    I grabbed every book on religion that interested me (ok it was magic that I was looking up but it still gave me a name to my beliefs). If it is a different religion you are looking for take a comparative religion class. If it is just a new church ask friends and family what church they like to go to. You may even just want to hit the phone book and look up what is in your area and visit services to see what you like/don't like.

  • chris
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    You want a Christian church that stays true to Scripture. Remember it is not about the fit, but about worshipping God. Find a good church that is biblio-centric (centered around the Bible).

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