Married women's opinions?

Though my interest in sex has decreased since getting married, it is more because I no longer "want" what is so readily available. I still enjoy sex and love my husband, so I think the woman who is no longer wanting sex at 33 has a hormonal problem or a relationship issue. For me, if my husband had ed and continued sexual interest, I would want sex even more--I'm just like that!

There are various reasons for a decreased sex drive.

She could be taking medications such as cholesterol-lowering or blood-pressure lowering drugs - these often decrease the sex drive.

Some husbands aren't exactly caring about their wives' needs, so sex becomes a chore.

And some women just have a low sex drive, and unfortunately they enjoy the romance-wedding day phase of the marriage and as soon as they get married they think well he's mine and just promised to never be with another so the hunt is over and ho-hum and that becomes an excuse to not have sex.

Now the sad thing is with this last group, they are - as I hear my married buddies tell me - the women who portray marriage as sex on demand 24/7/365 to their husbands. They were wild in bed before the marriage, and I think that's a huge form of lying. Couples really need to be honest and talk about their sex drives before they get married. It can drive a huge wedge between people when they are sexually incompatible.

Because when they lose interest the guy gets *really* frustrated. He'll, let's say, look at porn. And the woman tries to stop that to - it seems to men - control every orgasm the guy has. So then he starts sneaking around doing it or having an affair or goign to massage parlors or whatever. Not that he is justified, but the sex drive is a powerful one, and tough to just deny. No one is justified in cheating but women who promise sex then dry up then b*tch at a guy for buying Playboy or simply masturbating can make a man insane.

So not all women feel that way but I'd say of my 20 married guy friends, 16 or 17 complain of that very thing. Kinda sad.

I think some women get hormonal probs. Others have husbands who are just lousey in bed and they have no communication so nothing ever improves. I am 43 and married 6 years and together for 8 and i am still interested. Not as much as before but i have not lost the will to play and experiement and be close. Sometimes i dont want anything for myself but love to take care of my husband for his pleasure and to be close to him. It is a bonding i would never give up.

There are different levels of desire in people, however the attitude towards sex that you describe in my opinion go deeper than one person wants it 5 times a week and the other 2. I think in the situations you describe that relationship, personal, or sex counseling is needed. As long as the different levels of desire are workable within a relationship than everything is okay. If not, than something needs to be done about it or they will start resenting each other.

Though there are days I wish my husband weren't horny I know the first day that came and he wasn't I'd feel like I turned him off somehow. So, yes we may complain about it, but I believe deep inside we truly enjoy his horniness.

Honestly, I feel the opposite way. I wish both my partner and I were more sexually active with each other... I'm 28, he's 29 and we've been together for just about 8 years.

well my hubby is 36 and i am 28 and we have 4 children with baby #5 on the way and we love our sex life.

it is the best time to really see each other without having the children to distract us.

i don't think my hubby and i are ever gonna give up having some because we need it and enjoy it.

Good Luck

I strongly disagree with her. When I hear women say things like that, all I can think is that their partner must be doing something wrong. I definitely don't feel that way, I'd love to have sex every day.

I'm 32, been married for 11 yrs, and my husband and i have sex more than ever! We role play, use toys, etc. At 33, she should be at her peak, not menopause!

I'm 38 and I like sex as much as I always have. I can't see that changing for me. Some women maybe didn't like sex much in the first place.