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Hey Guys! Honest answers please-Ladies can answer as well!?

This is about my new fiance--i have already posted about him being a mama's boy, but when it comes down to it, he tells his mother everything--i mean everything--this pisses me off to no end and i don't know what to do-i am fed up---he thinks that since he was the only child they could have he has to be some angel and tell them what they want to hear-he does not stand up for himself and i am sick of it--we just got engaged but i do not want to live with his parents anymore---he thinks its ok 2 live at home till ur 25 or married or whatever and more and more i feel like an outsider--i always get out voted on things, and he says he loves me, but i feel like he truly does not care-its only what his parents want and what makes his mom happy--he seems more and more like a whimp and i have stopped confiding in him--tell me, would you risk a long term relationship/relationships in general with girls just to make your mom happy? i don't feel i stand a chance! Help!

15 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    It's a balancing act, for sure. Most people want to please their parents to some degree, even in adulthood. You can go way overboard with that, though.

    Living at home until you get married is one thing, but I would never want to live with my spouse's parents. You guys need to get out on your own.

    I know what it feels like to not want to ruffle my parents' feathers. I've made some decisions in my relationships because of it, but I've also found times where I've just had to stand up for myself. Family is important to your fiance, but you should be important to him as well. It all comes down to what you can put up with, and how much you really love him. I wouldn't discard him just because he wants to please his parents, but I would expect for him to stand up for himself from time to time.

    You'll just have to weigh it out.

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    I seriousily think you already know the answer to your question. What I dont understand is why youre on here asking what to do. Once a mommas boy always a mommas boy. Nothing will ever change so why would you want to stay in a relationship where you will always be #2 to mommy and where mommy will always know your every move before you do. Save your sanity and everything else and run like hell and never look back. Good luck

    Source(s): Florida Paralegal with a BS degree in Social-Pyschology
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Suzybel,you have read what my fellow posters have said,you knew the answer before that though didn't you deary? I think that you wanted confirmation really,just to make sure you are making the correct decision.(A couple of thousand heads are better than one!!) You know this can never go anywhere don't you suzy,indeed,you must have known for some length of time. Its not the type of relationship that i would contemplate to be honest with you,and being the mommy's boy/girl can't be any fun for them either,however,it IS all they have ever known.Best of luck to you m'dear, believe me,its for the best.

  • nilio
    Lv 4
    5 years ago

    If it had a attractiveness and manage in it i'd attempt to the contact the guy or woman immediately. I had had this happen to me and it replaced into once a proper blessing to carry close that there are some straightforward men and women round notwithstanding. I had chanced on some fashions myself and further them to the police station. If a lost merchandise isn't claimed after 3 months the finder can declare it. i chanced on a watch at the same time as on holidays, and surpassed it to the police. 3 months later the police mailed it to me.

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  • 1 decade ago

    It will not get any better. If you are complaining now, wait until you marry. When they get older it gets worse, he will have to take care of them. You children will not know how to have a healthy relationship. They might even fall for their dad's addiction.

    According to the bible, a man is to leave his parents and Cleve unto his wife. You see now how he is . You cannot change him. Leave before you are too far invested into his life. You will always be short changed in this relationship.

  • 1 decade ago

    Why are you marrying this guy?

    My ex-wife lived at home until 26, biggest mistake of my life.

    Personally, I'd tell him that you want to be with a man who can stand on his own, take care of himself, and not depend upon mom and dad.

    Personally, I want to see how they take care of themselves and the daily things that come up in life before ever getting married to a momma child.

  • 1 decade ago

    It doesn't sound like you should be living there.

    Momma's boys their momma usually does come first before any girlfriend and alot of wives.

    Why would you want to be living with a whimp let alone be engaged to one?

    You don't fit in. Get out now, and get one where you do fit in and feel loved.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Don't even get engaged until he's a man. No I mean a MAN. No need to be his baby sitter or mum replacement. Forget it. Just be his girlfreind and stay away from the home. Move out,get on criagslist and find a share apt. if u must.

  • Just say no. I don't think he'll change much and you don't need to be the topic of conversation in his little clique. A real man would focus on his fiance and take the heat (if any) from his mom.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    are you sure you want to go through this? Mamas boys are not a good idea unless you agree that he is glued to her hip. some things cannot be shared. I wouldnt do it

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