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If your partner self justifies everything they do wrong and blame you for their actions, how would you feel ?

If your dating someone & something just doesnt seem right, you pick up their cell phone to see if they are talking to other people and you see a name Laura. You ask the person who Laura is and they deny knowing the person. In the middle of the night, you wake up & find your partner naked, doing drugs, jacking off, they have a cam on and they are on the phone with Laura having phone sex & the person tells you, they did it because you suck at giving them blow jobs but you never knew there was an issue prior because they didnt tell you. Then the person doesnt stop and acts like you have a problem, how would you feel? Your partner also kept their drug habbit a secret from you & their son is in the house sleeping with along with other kids who came over to spend the night.

12 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    right on, BH!

    Get out of this relationship. It REALLY SUCKS!!

    Do it NOW!! no maybe or but

    OUT!!

  • 1 decade ago

    You need to calm down and wait for the company to leave. Then you need to get out of the relationship. If he wants to blame you, then fine, let him. But you need to walk away. He knows deep down that he is the one with the problem - but to avoid guilt he wants to turn it around. You didn't give many details, such as how long you have been together, or if the son is yours & his. Either way, just get out of the relationship. If the kid is yours too, then tell him that sometimes people love each other, but cannot get along. Reassure the child that they will still have both of you. Whether you love him, especially if you love him, you have to walk away. Don't argue, fight, or cry anymore. Do not allow him to destroy you, because he is selfish and trying to justify what he did wrong. If you aren't the greatest at fulfilling his personal needs, then maybe he does need a "whore" instead of a respectable woman.

  • 1 decade ago

    Move out and take everything you own with you. Call CPS to let them know anonymously that this mans drug use is taking place in the home while his own and other children are there that could easily walk in on him while he is pleasing him self over the Internet and you don't know how old this Laura is...she could be a child for all you know...You have no realtionship as he is already cheating on you and he has no respect for you as a person. Get out and get on with your life, you don't need that loser in the first place.

    Source(s): wkdpixy
  • Stark
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    HOLY SH*T what an AS*HOLE! Leave him now. Everything about him in your question leads me to believe he is a pig and an asshole. You will never be happy with this man. And jacking off in front of you is disrespectfull enough, but while on the phone and web cam with some other woman?? I would consider that cheating, i would feel cheated on. And he didn't even care that you saw him or knew. I would RUN in the opposite direction from this guy. He is BAD news.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I guess it would depend on what your partner is justifying and why. I dont think snooping in someones phone to find answers to your questions rather than just asking and accepting the answers you get is dishonest in itself. If you have no trust to begin with......then all else is incidental. If you are only in the dating stage of this "friendship", you need to accept who this person is and what they enjoy and\or participate in. I think you should have joined in on a playful level and not gotten so bent out of shape. After all, you are the one there with him, arent you? My guess is that the drugs were no secret to you, but once you felt betrayed, you are claiming ignorance. Am I right? If his actions are not acceptable to you, then you have the option of removing yourself from him and his behavior. throwing him under the bus with the children in the next room remark and denying your own participation in the partying and whatnot is sort of bitchy....dont you think? And, YES....Blowjobs are a staple to any healthy relationship. Practice makes perfect dont you know?

  • 1 decade ago

    First: I'd feel like calling Child Services, and the custodial parent, in regards to the drug use while children are in the home.

    Second: I'd feel like an idiot if I put up with a fraction of the crap you're having done to you.

    P.S. For future reference: Brush up on you head skills... for your next boyfriend.

  • Al B
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    you should feel lucky that you found this out and get as far away from the guy as you can!! you should know someone as a friend long enough to perhaps find these things out before getting more intimate, and when they do hide them from you, as he obviously did, be ready to kick the guy to the curb. You don't need that and are better than that!!

  • .
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    That would be the end...over, out of my house (or me out of his) and I'd get my life back on track and be thankful that I'd gotten away from such a loser so easily...

    I'd feel bad that I'd made a poor choice but good that I'd discovered it and gotten out...this life is too short to waste time on someone who doesn't deserve us...more time for ourselves or those who are worthy...

  • 1 decade ago

    I'd feel like telling him that he is the one with the problem. It's not your fault he didn't have the balls to tell you that there was a problem in the first place. I'd take my son and leave.

  • lex
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    sorry but this has junkie lies written all over,,,he wont take responsibility for anything most likely,,,,,it would be better to distance yourself from someone like this because if they are getting away with it now you will have to take much worse later on.

  • sunny
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    I would feel nothing because I wouldn't be there. You need to get rid of this guy he is a loser. You have to be worth more to yourself than that?

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