Question about child's whining?

Oh, the whining phase...something I'm not looking forward to dealing with with my daughter. I've done it already with 3 boys and this is a promise to work:

At the time she starts whining tell her FIRMLY, "______, this is a NO WHINING zone. If you're going to whine, then I'm going to leave the room." If she's like my boys, she'll stare up at you, trying to figure out what exactly a "Whining Zone" is. Zone is an interesting word to a 3yr old. She'll either stop or continue to whine, which is when you should just walk away from her and ignore her until she stops. After a few minutes, ask her, "Are you done whining? We can't have fun until you are done and your sister and i really want to do something fun." If she says yes, go off and do an activity and if she says no or continues to whine, walk away again. Eventually she'll understand that whinnying isn't going to get her the attention and that you're not going to put up with it. If she wants to through a fit, let her, just make sure the room she's crying in doesn't have anything she can get hurt on. Walk out of the room with the 2yr old but make sure she the 3yr old is still in view of you.

All three of my boys went though this phase and it drove me crazy! The phase lasted about a month or so. No i hear my kids telling my friends kids when they whine that they're in a no whinning zone. Best wishes to you and good luck! =]

I would approach it calmly and very matter of fact, the more attention the child gets from this the more often they will do it. I would say I see something is wrong...when you are done crying I'd like to talk to you about it, and then we can play something fun. I would then go on with regular activities, and let the child know you are there for them...when they can stop crying and use words. I'm not sure of the age, but if they are over three...they should learn to use words to resolve conflicts and problems. I don't mean you should ignore them, tell them you want to talk and will be there when they are ready, be calm and it usually rubs off on them. The child could also have some seperation anxiety issues from mom. I would discuss it with the mom, to find the root of the problem. In the meantime....find out the child's intrests, ask a lot of questions and be caring, calm , and enthusiastic about the child. Let them know you care and are there for them, but do not baby them during temper-tantrums.

It's attention seeking behavior, and I'll just betcha that her mother gives her the things she starts whining for. Whining is so irritating. I just tell her if she quits whining and lets you know if she wants something else, you'll give it to her. But it's important that she must play or use the object for an extended time. Also, reading to the kids from illustrated kids books, and asking her to help read some of the text will take her mind from whining. If she continues to whine, then read to younger child. The four year old will soon sit on your other side.

Explain why you are ignoring. This is what caused my son to stop whining VERY quickly:

"I cannot understand you when you are whining. My ears cannot hear that. You must say it in a normal voice or ask me a question"

Continue this with no break. Never lead on that you can hear the whining. Always ask her to repeat in a normal voice or as a question so you can understand.

That's what some kids do when they are 3. If she is successful getting her way with the whinning, expect to problem to grow. Ignore the whinning, ask her to put her request in the form of a question using words and move her off the whininng.

It's probably just a phase. You might try to divert her attention by doing something fun together, something that she enjoys. Otherwise, just give it time and see if it improves. If it doesn't, you might discuss it with her mom and see if she knows what might be wrong.