Why so much hostility amongst Mommy's when it comes to the bottle vs. breast feeding?

In todays world I am just happy to hear that a mother is feeding and taking care of their child. Breast or bottle I don't care as long as you love and take care of your babies. Let it go everyone-its ok to share your opnion without putting others down...the only wrong is the neglect and mistreatment of children going on right under our noses.

For the record I nursed till she had teeth at 4 months. My best friend wanted to nurse so bad but her daughter would have NOTHING to do with it and she ended up bottle feeding. My friend was so depressed that it was hurting me.

I breastfed my daughter for 3 months before I had to go on medication that wasn't good for breastfeeding. Everytime I pulled out a bottle in public it was inevitable that I'd get "such a young girl; doesn't know" looks from older ladies... and 4 out of 5 times I'd have to listen to it too. It's SO hard to look the other way everytime. To smile and nod. To say thank you for the words. Think back to when you were a brand new Mom and there wasn't a day that went by that someone felt the need to tell you how to do something, change something, improve something. While it's all really helpful and done with the best of intentions, it takes a toll on you, doesn't it? It makes you question if you'll be a good enough Mom. After enough, you'll begin to get bitter, protective, prejudgemental. No, I didn't do it on purpose or with predetermined thoughts of ill will toward these ladies, but I will admit that I didn't do too much to calm these feelings either.

Secondly, I just gave birth to twins 2 1/2 weeks ago. It was a surrogacy, and the twins were going home out of state. I asked a question here for advice on dealing with *not* breastfeeding. Half of the responses I received were straight up mean, telling me (what I ready know) about how breastfeeding is best and I should do it anyway. It didn't matter that I even explained myself and my reasoning for not breastfeeding, I still felt guilty over something I couldn't even control.

I'm not bitter; I understand at least my side. I think breastfeding is wonderful and the best thing a woman could do for her newborn. I'm also aware that there are circumstances where it's just not possible for her to be able to breastfeed. It just amazes me at how many closed-minded people are out there that are quick to dish their simple thoughts.

I hope that gives you a view from this side of the fence!

When I decided to formula feed my first child(after unsuccessfully trying to breastfeed), the nurses at the hospital wouldn't give me any help at all. I didn't know how much she should be eating or how often and if I asked questions, I was ignored. While the successful mothers were showered with advice and help. I felt like I had done something wrong. I left the hospital feeling like an utter failure with no support. Then when I didn't even try to with my second the nurses were even worse. At one point they refused to give a bottle for my son, saying you have food in you already, just give it to him. Then they had a counselor come in and ask me why I was hurting my child by not breastfeeding him. That is why I personally can't stand the holier that thou mothers who think you are a piece of garbage and are hurting your child by not breastfeeding. I don't have a problem with people who can breastfeed, I just don't like the ones who try to force it done your throat. I will bottle feed my third child and for once I will not feel guilty about doing it. I love my kids and would do anything for them, I just can't breastfeed. These have been my experiences so I hope that helps you understand why some people are so touchy on the subject.

Whether you Bottle or Breastfeed...is really just a personal choice! We've preferred Breastfeeding,only because we personally feel it's healthier,and more economical! I really cannot recall if anyone we have known has ever suggested that our choice to Breastfeed,is a bedamning indictment on those who choose Formula! You also have to remember that at one time-when we were Kids...they thought Formula was Corn Syrup and Milk in a Bottle! Todays Formula's are alot more balanced nutritionally...than what they were in the past! Also how Breastfeeding is regarded...depends on the "Social Attitude's" of where you live,and to some extent,the Social Circle's that you are in! Some people get really antsy about Women breastfeeding in Public! We do not feel it's offensive either way. Just a thought!

I have been given my pump at Wal Mart and it replaced into basically approximately 30-40 money and replaced into truly stable. It replaced into evenflo sort if that facilitates. in case you get a pump ineffective night feedings can nevertheless be divided between the adults interior the homestead. I tremendously advise getting bottle nipples and binkies that maximum bear a resemblance to the breast to help latching and so the toddler wont get at a loss for words. My established practitioner nevertheless allowed for a million cup of espresso on the same time as i replaced into breast feeding and with alcohol you will desire to attend a minimum of two-3 hours consistent with 8 ounce alcoholic beverage. you nevertheless would desire to ask your established practitioner before taking medicine although that's plenty much less inflexible than once you're pregnant. there is TONNNNSS of spectacular reward to breast feeding for the two mom and toddler. You burn around an further 500 energy an afternoon by utilising breast feeding which permits you lose your weight plenty swifter-- I lost all my toddler weight with none stunning weight-reduction plan or workout. It additionally facilitates your newborn's immune device and in case you seize something, your breast milk will produce antibodies to guard the toddler against it. It additionally dramatically decreases the possibility of your newborn ever starting to be to be obese. ever. yet another of one of my widespread reward is then you certainly can stay away from having a era for a on the same time as and in case you do have them they are in many cases no longer painful and extremely easy. wish that solutions your question & congrats on the hot toddler!!

I don't think that the problem arises when you discover a mother is breast feeding or formula feeding , I think it starts when people do exactly what you mentioned...making pro-formula parents seem like failures. No one likes to be judged , especially when it comes to parenting. I think breast feeding is wonderful...but I think formula feeding is wonderful also , if that is your choice. Yes , I am sure there are benefits to breast feeding , but every choice in life has it's pro's and con's , but the key word is choice. From sleep positions to when to start solids....we have guidelines to follow , not rules , but sometimes I notice that the "guideline" followers have an anger towards people who choose to do things their way. A lot of the arguments about breast feeding lead back to "no one had a choice back in the days and they did fine"....but if that was the way the world worked , no evolution , microwaves and pre-churned butter would not be on shelves.

I am bottle feeding my newborn. Unfortunetly my baby HATED the TASTE of breastmilk. I know....what? the taste? Yeah..he wouldn't eat. I could get him to latch on and then he would suck a few times and spit up and then just scream and scream. Finally a lactation consultent helped me and i pumped out an ounce or 2 of my "liquid gold"....the baby HATED it and spit it out and then spit up all of what he had swallowed. We tried again the next day when my milk came in and the day after that. He would still have nothing to do with it. I tried a bottle because he had lost almost 2 pounds in the hospital and he took right to that. He hasn't had anything to do with breastfeeding since then. He wouldn't even eat the milk i would pump. So after 2 weeks..i gave up pumping too.

So sadly..i wanted to breastfeed but couldn't. My baby wouldn't take to it and started getting sick. Now at 4 weeks old he weighs 10 pounds and is growing well and is already ahead of the curve for learning. I love him even though he wouldn't breastfeed and hes amazing. As long as hes healthy..i dont care what he eats!!!

all 4 of my babies have been formula fed.

i had a horrible experience trying to nurse my oldest, she would projectile vomit after every feeding, even when burped well. she would scream for an hour or so after every feeding, i could not handle it, i did this for a month before switching to lactose free formula, she did much better.

with my second she nursed wonderfully for 3 months, then one day just quit nursing and i dried up pretty much that day and had to put her on formula.

with my twins, they were in the NICU for 2 weeks and i could not be there for every feeding, and pumping did not do what i wanted it to, i pumped every 3 hours and still did not get enough to support both of them. so we went to formula.

i am hoping this one goes better.

however my mom nursed me for 3 months and i had the same problem my oldest did, turned out i was allergic to protien and could not handle breast milk or most formulas. i could not believe my mom put up with it for 3 months.

i am a supporter of breastfeeding, but i also understand the need for formula! i am glad there is something to use when nursing is not an option, i do think every mom should use breast milk as much as they can even if they chose to switch to formula because of the antibodies in the mommy's milk. even if i had a hard time with it, i would stick with it for at least a month.

I think this is just one of thoses subjects that will always promote controversy, I tried to breastfeed my daughter, but I was not making enough milk, the trouble is, if it's your first child you don't even know how much the baby is getting and my daughter lost weight before her first check up, I then changed to formula and she flourished and I felt great relief.

I think women tend to think they are all experts on the subject because their choice worked for them.

Another similar situation is the divide between stay at home and working Mums.

I have one breast-fed child, one formula-fed. Though both methods had their advantages, I can confidently say that I bonded equally well with both children, both are wonderfully healthy, and contrary to what many breast-moms would have you think, the bottle fed one does better academically.

No one should feel pressured to use the method that is not a fit for their lifestyle, health, etc. I think people get heated over the debate because the arguments in favor of each one seem to belittle the children who did the opposite. Wouldn't you be offended if a big billboard implied that your bottle fed baby wouldn't be as smart as a breast fed one? We instincively stick up for our kids, so the debate continues.

Why I chose the way I did: Wanted to do everything "right" for the first one. She latched on easily and gained weight at a healthy rate. Still wanted to do everything "right" for the second one, but he had health problems- wouldn't latch on, couldn't gain weight. We changed our view of what was "right" and it worked for him.