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what do i do when my boyfriend tells me he's been very busy and can't really spend time with me?

every since high school ended. me and my boyfriend's relationship is being distant. I love him so much and he loves me but it's just he don't call me no more or come to see me. He use to be with me all day everyday when we was still in high school but now that the summer time has came, he's been trying to get his college stuff together because he want to find out what college he will get accepted in. i mean i can understand that but he could at least call me and tell me what's up even if it's only for a minute. YES I ALREADY TOLD HIM HOW I FELT n he really didn't say anything about it. the other day i told my cousin to call him and put it on three way because they are like best friends or whatever. So she did it and the talked about how's his life and our relationship. he basically said that our relationship hasn't been the same every since we graduated and that he's been so busy with getting his college stuff together. so i mean what am i suppose to do with him? should i wait 4 him

Update:

we've been together for 4 months and it was a wonderful relationship until this happened. so i mean what am i suppose to do? i can't stop thinking about it. i don't want to leave him because i know that i'm gonna regret it. so should i wait until he get his self together? but at the same time why doesn't he call me AT ALL?????

Update 2:

YOU PPL I AM GOING TO COLLEGE TOO. AND IF HE WANTED TO BREAK UP WITH ME HE WOULD DO SO WITH NO PROBLEM...

17 Answers

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  • Ariel
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Hang out with your friends and give him some space and time to do the things he needs to do. Wait for him though he might just be really busy right now.

  • 1 decade ago

    If this guy is busy enough that he cant get time to even call you leave alone visiting or taking you out, then he isnt at all serious. what does he do when you call him? That is supposed to show you just how he considers your relationship. Ask him upfront what he wants in this relationship. He isnt supposed to keep you in suspense of where your relationship is headed to. If he cares, let him show it. Dont sit around and wait for him to change his behaviour he might never change. on the other hand dont go on a relationship rebound. when he said that your relationship is not the same since u cleared high school, what is he willing to do about it? I mean to change the attitude he has been having?

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    To me, it's not respecting yourself to wait around until HE has time for you. Girl, you need to get out there, find a life, find hobbies and interests of your own - stop waiting around for HIM! Right now, he's just not in a place where he really wants a r'ship it seems. So, why put yourself through that heartache? It doesn't mean things have to end badly, but I would let him know I'm no longer waiting around for him. I would tell him I understand that right now he's too busy for a r'ship but you deserve someone who will make you at least somewhat of a priority in his life. Then move on! Find a guy who IS in the right time of his life for a r'ship and have fun! Girl, you're too young to settle down......now is the time to just explore and experience new people.

  • 1 decade ago

    Ok my answer for you is to stop, you are making a big deal out of nothing. Why arent you trying to get you college stuff together. Focus on you career and all and stop worrying about a guy who is thinking about his future. He is probably trying to find a career that will alow him to provide for the both of you as a family if thats in his plan. You two have been together for 4 month, wow.. thats no big deal. Girl he is probably wondering why you not going for you career goals. Look if he spoke to your cousin and didnt say anything bad about the relationship then jus chill and relax. You are stressing over nothing, focus you energy on something more productive. As i was told one whats your is yours so dont stress it.

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  • Wiser1
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Ah. That is very normal. He is getting ready to move on with his life and you aren't in the "same place" these days. He is going off to college (are you?). He will meet other women in college and have new goals and ideas about life. Yours was a wonderful high school romance, but it is probably over and you need to move on and build yourself a great life and find someone new. Notice I said "probably." Sometimes, after we have matured and finished our education and found the right job, we realize that the one person we want to share our life with is back home in that familiar place. He may be back. But it's best not to count on it, honey. He has broken up with you right now.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You need to be somewhat independent and have a life of your own. No man wants a clingy girlfriend. Have fun with your friends and get a hobby. Join a club, start volunteering, get a job. Do something with your time away from him so you can both appreciate the time you have together.

  • ?
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    Awww i assume i'm no longer the only woman interior the international with an identical concern. adult adult males, they do no longer seem to be as complicated as they might prefer to think of they are. i've got been in a courting for 3 years and while my Bf first suggested the comparable element i presumed the comparable element you're thinking then i found out that adult adult males have a 'stupid' way of thinking. they think of that they are going to 'harm' us in the event that they are away, no longer around etc so as that they say the main random issues just to guarantee themselves that we are going to no longer blow over. He would not recommend something. i'm confident if he needed to interrupt up he allow you to comprehend on your face, he has a son so i'm guessing he's guy adequate to allow you to comprehend issues are over. think of beneficial. issues would be ok. I made a mistake and made issues worse with my Bf cuz i presumed he grow to be making plans to end issues while he suggested he grow to be going to get busy, so out of journey i'm expectantly asking you to no longer say something.

  • kitty
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    I WOULD CALL HIM AND SIT HIM DOWN AND ASK HIM WHY HE FEELS THE RELATIONSHIP ISN'T THE SAME?? WHAT HAPPENED?? OR MAYBE HE'S GOING OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE I DON'T MEAN TO HURT YOU BUT DON'T SIT AROUND THEY AREN'T YES HE COULD CAN BUT IF HE DOESN'T HE'S TRYING TO LET YOU DOWN EASY FORGET HIM IF HE DOESN'T LOVE YOU HE CAN'T RETURN THE LOVE ..................................START GOING OUT MAKE SURE THAT HE HEARS YOUR GOING OUT AND SEE HOW FAST HE COMES OVER ......AND IF YOU END UP W/ SOMEONE ELSE THAT'S HIS TOUGH LUCK YOU BEING NOT HOME IS WHAT YOU NEED TO DO THEN WHEN HE CALLS THEY CAN SAY YOUR NOT HOME MAKE HIM WONDER !!

  • 1 decade ago

    when ur bf is busy u can spend time with me dear !!!!! (just kidding) well if he is really busy u should try n understand him. if he is fooling u, better start doing something that u like to do. if u think ur relationship can not survive end it n be good friends u can find another bf for u. be happy

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    well all realationships have problems you just got to hang in there my boyfriend works and sometimes i feel like he is so busy for me but i realised he is working and makeing money to keep food on the table and a roof over my head and paying the bills. and yes you should alway wait for him he loves you just remember that.

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