What did they never tell you about aging?

Happy Birthday a bit early!

I work with primarily senior citizens and am told over and over that whoever said they are the golden years must have been 30!

I have learned it is important to have a plan, that wider doorways and a 1 level home are better, that developing hobbies and having a curious mind make for a much more enjoyable later life, a sense of humor is absolutely a must- especially if you have physical limitations that require personal care, that physical bodies wear out- joints, and eyes and ears, and brains............ but the spirit can shine no matter what!

When I was a kid, I wanted to be a lot of things, but one of then was NOT wrinkled! So much that that gift of age. I suppose that I thought nothing physical would ever catch up to me..after all, I was going to live forever. Today, if it were not for Ibuprofen, I suspect I would not move around much..but thankfully, there IS Ibuprofen. I worry when I cannot quite reach a word that I know damned good and well I should have at my tongue's tip...but then I think back and there were always times when that happened...they just happen with greater regularity lately. At least I can still play very good bridge, but I suppose there will come a day when that will leave. I love working out, but lately, although the strength is still there, the back hurts when I lift the same wieght I could lift a year ago...this is cause for concern. (Arthritis is NOT something I planned on). When I had a heart attack, I waited 3 hours, for I was dead certain that I could NOT be having a heart attack....no, not me! My eyes are the same, my hearing is a little worse for wear (too many nights spent at the disco), but in general, everything is right on target...after all, I am still 18 in my head. (I have a very hard head, don't I?)

My mom and I purchased a house together and she is now 79. Anything I ever wanted to know about aging I see though her as a living witness to me.

She lived a very healthy life up until last year when she got sick and her kidneys failed. Her eyes are not doing so well but she can still see and drive, and she has only lost a little hearing. I watched her turn "old" right before my eyes. But she is still sharp as a tack. Her hair has thinned, strength in her hands has diminished, yet she is still able to do for herself with a little help from me.

I only hope to be in the same shape she is in if I am fortunate enough to have a 79th birthday. So I know everything, no secrets.

What truly gets to me, when I allow myself to think about it at all, is how truly vulnerable I now am physically...

I have just as much motivation to get all those heavy jobs done as I once had, but I now find myself HAVING to stop half way through a tasking process and rest, because I just DON'T HAVE the energy necessary to carry on just then.

And my skin has grown so thin that I can give myself a nasty cut by opening a bottle!! I have had to get a piece of thin rubber matting to grasp between my hand and any bottle top I am opening, just to prevent the painful scrapes and cuts.

And my bones are so fragile now...I have early onset osteoporosis, and I very rarely go without one bone or another broken in each of my feet. They used to take anywhere from 2 to 6 months to heal again, but I think that time has passed. Currently the outside bone (baby toe side) on my left foot has been broken for 7 months, and I am in as much pain now stepping on it, as I ever was at the beginning. The problems with my bones means that I have to be EXTREMELY CAREFUL in everything I do. I guess broken hips are the next thing I have to look forward to.

So yes, you can expect all the little aches and pains. What we don't seem to realize when we are young is that those little aches and pains ARE JUST THE BEGINNING. By the time you reach any true old age you are going to be in almost constant pain from true aches caused BECAUSE of our ages. And these are probably directly proportionate to the amount of abuse we visited on our bodies when we were young.

First of all, congrats on approaching your 70th !!

I'm "only" 44, but I know the thing that has surprised me the most thus far is just how much it sneaks up on you. It truly is like you just wake up one day and you're 40 ! I guess tomorrow I'll wake up and be 70 :) That's why it's important to live life day by day and not always be looking ahead and putting things off.

OH....one more I just thought of and had to add. I NEVER like the way I look in pictures that are taken of me anymore. A bad shot used to be the rarity....now it's the rule !

Honey, no one ever told me how great it would be..I just turned sixty-five on the fourth..

I have time to pamper me...that is great after raising eight children...and I do mean pamper me...at the salon...massages, nails, eyebrow waxing,nails, and shampoos. Then I have time to follow up on that at home. Work out three to four times a week.

I take vitiamins, and pain releivers for occassional aqches and pains

No one told me how horney I would be...and how good sex would be...now that I don't worry about pregnancy. There is a certain freedom...oh yes..and you don't have to worry about a kid knocking on the door...tehehe

They never told me that after the struggle of raising my eight children the rewards would be greater than the struggle...you share in their acheivements and successes....and the big bonuses...tehehe....and the best part is the grand children......

They didn't tell me that I had to plan a life out side of my family...now that was a rude awakening...My children was my life... every thing I did centered around them...Now I have to plan a life....to be busy....to do something every day. Have projects to do...or go somewhere...meet friends for lunch or even breakfast....volunteer...go to lectures and even learned a forgien language.....or go to thearpy.....shopping...shopping thearpy is good for the soul...I enjoy fashion... and I keep up with what is the latest.....

I hear a lot about seniors being depressed, however I think that is what society want us to be...I see very few seniors that seem to be depressed. That is one statistic I refuse to be in. Eating healthy and exercising is the key to good mental health....I am sixty-five and I love to tell my age because I love to see the look on the faces when I tell them....and then that I am the mother of eight children and ten grand, and one great grand.

Good luck with your book

P.S

and my memory is good

What surprises me the most is that I'm 56 on the outside, but I'm still 17 on the inside ... sometimes that's fun, but at other times, it's 'weird' ... I can be doing housework and suddenly get this 'weird feeling' that my mother or grandmother would 'disapprove' of the way I keep house ... and they have both been dead for YEARS. I just 'shake it off' but it's there, and that 'bugs me' some ... but at least I raised my kids 'better' ... except for some reason, they all LOVE GARDENING because I was a professional gardener when they were small. My second son showed 'no sign' of this, until one day when he was 20 he was watching a woman 'struggle' with planting a small 'rock garden' ... he just shook his head, and started to do it 'correctly' ... I'd taught him how when he was 8, and he 'remembered' that. The lady was SO PROUD of her rock garden, and told everyone 'Dylan taught me how' ...

That you are the same person at 20 as you are at 50 or older. You may have had some hard times or a wonderful life but your personality and heart are still the same, it's just the body that's different.

Menopause.

Unconditional love.

The repercussion's of divorce.

The compromises involved in a second marriage.

The quality of friendship and how it changes.

Family, grandchildren, far away.

Working when I should be retired and watching my grandchildren grow up.

Active, happy parents becoming ill.

Care taking.

Alzheimer's.

Alcoholism, heart disease, melanoma and other problems from abusing out bodies when we were young.

The importance of forgiving, listening and playing with children.

Hey! Do you want to be my friend? I've got more to offer.

My mom calls memory lapses "senior moments", It scares me when I can't remember things! I call them "Junior moments," Cuz I'm only in my late 20's. Already having back and knee problems, I hear they will only get worse! Happy birthday!