My partner has just been 'found' by his birth family.?

This has got to be a big shock for him. It can work both ways in that a child who goes looking can be rejected. If he is not interested as you say....respect taht....he needs space and time to come to terms with it all. Adoption agencies have councellors in place to helpboth parties. He can make an appointment to chat it through. Whatever decision he comes to if it feels right for him be there in support. It is a minefield always.....and time.......does help.

I was adopted and I went hunting for my Birth mother quite a few years ago I found her but it was not a great outcome. That is perhaps why I don't understand what his problem is. At a guess he has never really been comfortable with himself and this experience has resurfaced a whole lot of questions he has avoided answering till now. May be some one else could suggest the support groups but I would suggest to you you arrange some time-out for your self ( for sanity's sake). As I say to my Kids life aint fair or unfair.... it just is! It sounds like your partner needs to understand that saying. In other words he has to get over the "what ifs......No one can pick their parents so wishing something-else had happened is crazy!.

I wish I could help, but you don't say what the problem is.