what are the warning signs( red flags ) that a man is controlling and jealous ?

When he chains you to the radiator on his way out to the shops!

These red flags are usually like real red flags....very easy to spot.

A man who is controlling and jealous will not want you to spend any time with your other friends, unless he is with you, and even then, he may prefer to be just with you alone. He will not want you going out anywhere with your girl friends, or people from work. He will want to know where you are at almost all times.

If some other guy even talks to you, he will be uncomfortable, or worse, with it.

Then it's "who was that?" when your cell phone rings.

Should you start living together this will begin to effect such things as grocery costs, and how each penny is spent.

One red flag is that a person asks what the red flags are.

If you are involved with someone who is already coming across to you like he "might" be controlling or jealous, chances are he is.

If so, you will not change him, no matter what you think and no matter what he says.

The only thing worse than being involved with such a man, is marrying one.

Sneaks into your texts when you are out of the room. Monitors all your facebook conversations when you are asleep. Gets jealous and makes you feel like **** when you go to visit your daughter. Thinks it's all rigged especially when your daughters fiance's dad is visiting at the same time. After being the confronting person. He then plays this, he thinks he is ill. Gets mad when you are taking a few days to go away with female relatives. Often complaining he hasn't been anywhere for months. When he has. When we go places and its a vacations. He gets pushed off when we find others to talk to. He sits there and glares at me and ignores them. Doesn't understand how I can have relationships with family who hurts me, especially when I forgive them and get over things and move on. In his case. He has been in a family feud for over two years and he won't just let it go. Constantly talks negative about others.

Tells you what to do.

Keeps you from working

Gives you an allowance

Get's jealous of your friends

Holds you back from having life

Treats you like a slave

Thinks you should do everything while he lounges

Expects to have sex when he wants no matter how you feel.

Forbids you to use the phone or leave the house when he is at work.

Doesn't allow you to have a social life.

Keeps you away from family

Tells you not to talk to family.

May have a substance abuse problem like drugs/alcohol

Has a very short temper

expects everything to be perfect

Expects to have dinner on the table when he comes home from work.

Cannot control anger may be abusive verbally or physically.

These are to name a few.

May God Bless You.

Best Wishes.

Attempts to keep you from having a social life and sometimes it feels as though he has placed a tracking device on you, is overly jealous with no real reason, tells you how to dress, overly critical so much so to make you feel bad, gets easily angered, tells you how to spend your money...and he usually lacks his own, is very self-absorbed, is violent or threatening, makes decisions for you without your consent, lacks empathy, blames you and others and acts as though he can do nothing wrong. These are just a few of the many warning signs of a controlling and/or abusive man. It is wise to get out early if a man displays any of these behaviors and they will progressively get worse.

Being controlling and jealous are signs of extreme insecurity. Some signs are when you tell him for instance that you are going out with ur girlfriends and he grills you about it over and over to make sure you're not meeting any guys, or he may resort to calling you frequently while you're out somewhere just to "check up" on you. Another might be when you spend time with your family and he gets annoyed because he feels it could be taking away from time with him..this extends to choose your friends, calling you names in and out of public to humiliate you, makes demands on you and stuff like that...if thats happening to you or someone you know, please leave him and the situation and talk to family members or ppl in your life who TRULY care about you!

1. He tries to control your autonomy.

2. He tries to control your identity.

3. He tries to control your freedom of choice.

4. He tries to control your freedom of movement.

5. He tries to control your friends or family.

6. He tries to control day-to-day activities.

7. He is overly curious of your phone or other bills.

8. He is usually angry and you are the focus.

9. You have to ask permission (believe me, take a step back to see if you have begun asking permission for things you might not have 6 months ago).

10. He cares the least and therefore has the most power in the relationship.

In no particular order:

When he questions your every move.

Makes you feel guilty for talking/visiting family & friends (in particular the opposite sex).

Tells you what to wear (your skirts get longer not shorter).

Listens to all conversations.

Gets 'needy' to make you feel guilty and stay home.

They are all common indicators that something is not right in the relationship and the "red flag" signs are actually your gut telling you to get out before things really flare up (emotional to physical abuse).

I agree with all of the above answers, I would like to add that sometimes these controlling types can be very subtle. For example, he may not come out and say " i dont want you hanging out with your friends anymore." It may reveal itself in other ways like putting your friends down, not telling you when they call, sabatoging get togethers with your friends, etc. That is one thing about controlling types. They are sometimes very good at not appearing like the bad guy. Be smart. ;)

Sabotaging friendships. Reads your e-mails. Follows you to work, or grocery store. Never lets you answer the phone. Makes all the major household decisions without you. Asks you to change yourself to please him. Belittles you, breaks down your self esteem. Questions you endlessly about where you are going or where you have been. Isolates you from your family and friends. Those are just a few that I can think of now.

he tells you were you can go, who you can talk to and get smad at you for talking to anyone, tells you how to dress and how not to dress and if you dont do what he likes he throws a fit. He manipulates you away from your friends and family. He wants all your time all the time. He calls you five hundred times a day and gets pissed when you arent answering his calls. There are many many other signs and they only get worse. he shows up at your work to "CHeck" on you. He is always at your house.