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love
Lv 6
love asked in Society & CultureHolidaysChristmas · 1 decade ago

How can you politely tell someone you don't want to exchange gifts?

I know I sound like a bit of a Christmas scrouge, but I would like to avoid exchanging gifts with everyone but my mother, grandma and fiance. These are the only people in my life that really matter to me, and I don't want to spend lots of money on gifts. I also HATE shopping. I'm doing okay finacially, but I feel that it is silly to recieve gifts from friends and extended relatives that don't know me well enough to pick out something other than a gift card. It seems even more silly when I feel obligated to return the favor with another gift card. Essentially, we both just write each other a $50 check, when I exchange gifts with some friends and family memebers. How is throwing money at each other in Chirstmas spirit? How can I hint at not wanting to exchange gifts this season?

12 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    You can't hint. You need to just tell them how you feel. We just have a white elephant exchange for adults on my side of family now. (except kids)

    My opinion, for what is is worth is, amongst adults this is fine. Christmas presents are for kids.

    I will share this. My husbands youngest (by 10 years) brother got married and decided they no long wanted to buy gifts for his nieces and nephews. I was really upset. I brought HIM a gift every year even when broke and newly married or new house and kid etc. I don't care that he cut off gifts for me and his brother but he cut out my 9 and 7 year old kids and his other two niece/nephews. He received gifts the whole time he was growing up from Aunts and Uncles and his older brothers.

    They have since had children and I always get them a gift because it's what feels right to me. Interesting, they have never suggested we stop.

    What ever you decide . Good luck.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I've heard of families drawing names during Christmas. At the family get together, each person exchanges a gift with that one person. I guess if you really want to get presents especially for your mom, grandma, and fiance, you can do so after the get together to avoid any hurt feelings. The only thing about this is you have to have full cooperation from the rest of the family since not everybody likes the idea.

    Just a suggestion, this may be helpful and might not. You'll probably have to wait until next year since many people have already bought gifts.

  • 1 decade ago

    I know my family is too large for everyone to buy gifts for each other so I would suggest "the hat" method that way you will only have to buy one gift for someone you aren't as close to, and you set rules on spending like not more than $20. It would be a good alternative to shutting off everything completely, everyone else you can get cards and wish them a merry christmas. In the end everyone gets a gift, and they aren't felt neglected the same way.

  • Cupid
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Then you just don't shop.. you are not obligated to purchase gifts for anyone you don't want to... there are some people, on the other hand, who enjoy buying gifts for people and enjoy GIVING.. so you telling them not to buy you anything would probably hurt their feelings more than if you just simply didn't buy them something. If they EXPECT a gift in return, then that is their problem and something is wrong with them. Best Wishes!

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  • 7 years ago

    I'm a type of person that likes to give presents. It hurts when you're hear this words "DON'T GIVE ME A GIFT CAUSE I'M NOT GOING TO GIVE GIFTS" I don't expect anything in returns at all. This is just my way of appreciating someone I care. I've done so much for her, she's my best friend since college. It just hurt.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Just tell the ones that normally give you gifts that you are not going to give gifts this year because of some unexpected bills. Yes, this maybe a little white lie, but, that's OK. It's better than telling them "Don't give me anything for Christmas because I am not going to give you anything."

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    My nana doesn't want to exchange gifts. Not because her family means crap to her, but because she's short on money. The lady she works for is on her death bed and the lady's daughter doesn't take over. She usually goes all out on Christmas. Spoils her grandkids and buys them everything. but she probably will end up getting everyone something. she even got my dog something this year.

    She doesn't want anyone to get her anything, because she'll feel bad. but I'm still getting her something because it's about giving, not recieving.

    In honestly, christmas isn't about presents. so if you feel strongly, just tell them.

  • 1 decade ago

    Just politely say that you have decided that this year you are only buying gifts for your mom, grandma and fiance and let the others know not to be obligated to purchase something for you.

  • ?
    Lv 4
    5 years ago

    Why could you elect to do this? money? you do no longer choose to get something on your nieces and nephews? Hmm... We stop replacing birthday presents with our niece and nephew and our little ones, yet we continually have something for them to open on Christmas as quickly as we occasion. some years that's smaller than others, however the little ones are continually satisfied and my little ones have relaxing determining on issues out for their little cousins. i think of despite if that's something small, a minimum of the little ones recognize they have been given something from Uncle Charley and Aunt Maggie and the cousins. in spite of the undeniable fact that, in case you elect to insist which you're so broke that Christmas is now no longer the season of giving, you should deliver it up on your sister like this: "i became into style of thinking approximately Christmas the different day. What do you think of roughly each and every of the present replacing?" And open it up that way. the different ingredient you should do is take the concentration off presents and take each and every of the little ones out someplace relaxing on an afternoon in early January or for the duration of Christmas trip and have that be their Christmas present between the aunts and uncles. I save hoping to handle to pay for passes to our interior sight entertainment park and this massive steamboat that is going on the lake to have a summer season day trip with our niece and nephew and my husband's brother and his spouse -- exceptionally if we are able to do it with out my different sister in regulation and the grandparents horning in.

  • 1 decade ago

    I hear you. It is ridiculous. I wish that I could do this because it would relieve me of so much stress. (financial anyway)

    Is there someone in common that you can tell that can kind of get the message in a nonchalant, non confrontational kind of way? You wouldn't want to appear overly assertive and negative.

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