Ladies: I need your help - F Zone issues?

Question

I've been having a crush on my only female friend for around two years. We live in different states but communicate by mail and e-mail. I've been trying to stay in the background to see if someday I can become something more to her. She calls me her main supporter and I'm sure she knows how I feel about her.
I'm always nice to her. Last year I sent her a Valentine's Day e-mail and she replied back right away as a frined with a friendly Valentne's Day e-card. So, this year I tried the same thing. I do acknowledge I went a little bit deeper because this time I included what happened in a couple of dreams I had. Nothing but G-rated stuff being together, k-i-s-s-i-n-g, having kids, etc. The rest of the e-mail was the regular stuff she's heard from me before: she is the most wonderful woman in the world, I wouldn't trade her for Jessica Biel, etc.
Now, she never got back to me and I'm not holding my breath either. However, did I upset her so much our friendship is over?
What should I do?

LOVEISTHEANSWER · Accepted Answer

Felix, I like your questions and answers very much.  You're an up-front kind of guy.  That being said, I'm gonna shoot straight with you:  she's a friend only.  You would know if she wanted to take your friendship to the next level because she would let you know.  You are her "main supporter," and when you speak of dreams and intimacy and a future you change the interaction.  You can a) keep things the way they were, depending on how much frustration you can handle; or b) tell her that you have a crush on her and you'd like to know if the feeling is mutual (depending on how much honesty you can handle).  You don't always have to play by somebody else's rules.  I had a dear, male friend.  He was "my main supporter" when I was going through a stressful and sad time.  He'd do anything for me.  I was a very good friend back to him.  But he decided he wanted more.  And even though I miss his friendship and companionship, I really respected his position which was that he couldn't handle being just "friends" because his heart was involved.  So, we stopped spending so much time together, and I had to stop treating him like he was just a buddy pal.  I had to respect the boundaries that needed to be set to keep his heart from being broken, and I didn't want to lose his friendship completely because he was such a great man - just not a man I wanted to marry or be "intimate" with.  That's my take on it.  But follow your heart, and don't be afraid to take risks - you have much to gain if things go the way you hope they will.

T H · Answer

If I were you, I would give it a few more days and then send a friendly email to her.

Seems to me that you got in deeper than what she wanted.  Now she is either taking a breather from you (to decide where she wants this relationship to go) or she has decided that you went too far and she has to break it off before it goes any further.

Either way, I think this girl was enjoying all the attention that you had been giving her with no strings attached.  Now you are putting strings out there and she is backing off.

Anonymous · Answer

just wait...maybe she's busy with her bf or just busy....be patient

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Ladies: I need your help - F Zone issues?

3 Answers