What is a mentally abusive relationship?

Emotional abuse means threatening a teen or

harming his or her sense of self-worth. Examples

include name calling, teasing, threats, bullying, or

keeping a teen away from friends and family.

1 in 4 adolescents reports verbal, physical, emotional,

or sexual abuse each year

1 in 11 high school students reports being physically

hurt by someone they were dating

Who is at risk for

dating abuse?

Teens report dating abuse more often than other age

groups. Among teens, boys often start the violence and

use greater force. Girls are more likely than boys to be

the victims of sexual abuse.

Studies show that people who abuse their dating

partners are more depressed, have lower self-esteem,

and are more aggressive than peers. Other “red flags”

for dating abuse include:

• Use of threats or violence to solve problems

• Alcohol or drug use

• Inability to manage anger or frustration

• Poor social skills

• Association with violent friends

• Problems at school

• Lack of parental supervision, support, or discipline

• Witnessing abuse at home

Places to learn more:

Choose Respect Initiative

www.chooserespect.org

National Domestic Violence Hotline

1-800-799-SAFE (7233)

National Sexual Assault Online Hotline

1-800-656-HOPE (4673)

National Sexual Violence Resource Center

www.nsvrc.org

National Youth Violence Prevention Resource Center

www.safeyouth.org

Love Is Not Abuse

www.loveisnotabuse.com

I hope this helps!

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While I agree it is a relationship in which one is not equal to another, it isn't a relationship in which one is "always" called bad names or belittled. Sometimes, the abuser is incredibly sweet, nice and wonderful. Sometimes, the abuser is belittling, angry and cruel. That's what makes it so hard to break away. The one person loves it when the abuser is kind to them and then confused when the abuse begins. Then it all goes back the other way again. It's very up and down, with highs and lows and lots of dramatic stuff in between. It is very very hard to break away. Look up Stockholm Syndrome on the internet for more info.

If the person gives rules to you that you must obey, for example, that you must dress a certain way, that is an example of mental abuse. Other examples: making you feel that no matter what you do you cannot please the person (maybe they are never happy with presents you buy them); if they flirt with other people in front of you, that is mental abuse; if the person always makes all the decisions in the relationship; if the person constantly teases you; if the person is constantly critical of you; if the person tells you that you cannot continue hanging out with your friends; if the person never tells you that he or she loves you; if the person acts warm and loving to you one day and the next day acts very distant and cold; all these are examples of mental abuse, in my opinion.

Its hard to define mental abuse. The DSMIV has an official definition that you could look up (the Diagnostic and Statistics Manual for Mental Disease - Version 4, and version 5 is supposed to be out sometime this year)

Mental abuse is a factor in every other type of abuse. If it doesnt effect you mentally, it wouldnt be abuse. It is making you feel bad for actions that are not wrong. Making you feel bad for things that are not your fault. Making you think you dont have the right to the things you do indeed have the right to. Making you think something bad is or will be your fault when you had nothing to do with it.

An example---

A few years ago when my cousin first hooked up with her now husband.. During a fight, he told her right in front of me that he cant stand fighting and yelling and that if she didnt do as he asked he would go drive off a cliff because he cant stand fighting because his dad stabbed him in the back with a knife when he was 8. That was the first she had ever heard of the abuse his dad supposedly (i clearly dont believe it) done towards him. I saw it in her eyes the second he said it.. she was afraid of going against his wishes because of his threat to kill himself. She didnt speak to her sister for the next 2 and half years because of that statement and her fear of what he would do. Also in that conversation was a statement that if she didnt do as he wanted he would leave her

To this day she follows every word he says or asks out of fear,

belitting you, your ideas or your opinions, treating you like you or ur ideas or opinions dont matter, making jokes at your expense, put downs, control over things in your life, making you to feel crazy, inadequate, etcetera, it can take more subtle forms too like making you watch or hear something that upsets u, ie u not wanting to hear about war because it scares u and them telling you all about war, knowing how u feel about it,making fun of you, insulting you, minimizing issues or concerns u have, minimizing their behavoir towards you...diff types of abuse cross over into each other, mental, verbal, emotional, spiritual, financial, the only one that is specifically discerned from the others is physical...

google it, there is a lot of information online about abuse

another thing to remember is this...would u let a man treat ur friend the way ur man treats u? if not, chances are its abusive...and if u find that u know what hes doing is wrong, but u keep making excuses for his behavior, its abuse

good luck

When one person calls the other stupid or ingnorant or makes them feel intimidated. If you are nervous around the person who is treating you like this then you are probably in an abusive relationship. Been there done that...no more!!

mentally abusive is messing with your mind, dosent have 2 be physical mental abuse can be worse , get out of this relationship he will do your head in ,it will get worse my love it may hate but it will be better in the long run for you, good luck,

Control you

put you down

tell you your stupid

say that your ugly and worthless

you can't do anything right

Nobody else likes you

call you names

cheat on you

degrade you in front of others

tells you nobody else will have you

yells at you instead of talking calmly to you

they are always right and you are always wrong

cuts down your dreams and goals in life

harbors resentments

they are jealous of your other friends and want you to cut them off.

display anger toward you

they avoid you till they get their way

reject you intimately

lie and tell you your crazy when you know better

mental abuse could be a number of things. if one person calls them bad names, belittles them, makes them feel like less of a person, ect. mental abuse and verbal abuse are pretty much the same thing or at least they tie in together.

Mental abuse consists of someone trying to control you, calling you names, putting you down, calling you stupid etc....

Never has anything nice to say about you, always belittling you in order to gain control over you...