Yahoo Answers is shutting down on May 4th, 2021 (Eastern Time) and beginning April 20th, 2021 (Eastern Time) the Yahoo Answers website will be in read-only mode. There will be no changes to other Yahoo properties or services, or your Yahoo account. You can find more information about the Yahoo Answers shutdown and how to download your data on this help page.

What are your thoughts on this poem I wrote several years ago?

The Hide and Seek of Truth

I often look in the direction of heaven,

and try to see what I used to see;

an ever moving portal

to an alabaster world above.

Now the ocean spreads beneath canvas sky,

with folds of tide and silver lining;

half moons tossed

to shipwrecked souls,

and I equate this to You; your wrath of nature

spilling over my toes;

clinging to the silken fabric of the earth

as it's pulled from beneath my feet,

and leaving me to balance

myself on this rocky shore.

Sea gulls call

and I remember their cries,

joyous,

until I learned of their faltering flight;

their constant struggle

for shelter and global warming;

evolution, supernovae

and dinosaur fossils,

unearthed-

like my belief in you.

I long to see the sky as I did then,

so I look for another way to believe;

because the absence of faith

is a disappointed child-

a gathering fog,

and a vanishing world--

and this filtered illusion

of land and sea.

16 Answers

Relevance
  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    if you combined the 2nd and 3rd section would be a simple way to make it flow better since you haven't completed a thought where you have it separated.

  • 1 decade ago

    i heard the sounds and felt the textures. you tugged my emotions and made me think. this is a wonderful piece of poetry. just imagine - if you wrote so well a few years ago - what could you write today!

  • 1 decade ago

    i deff. like the mood and tone

    i love it

    its very beautiful and deep

    u have a real talent there

  • 1 decade ago

    IT IS really GOOD!!

    Seriously I'm not joking but you really have a talent. Good Job.

    keep writing it's really good.

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • 1 decade ago

    WOW!!! Thats deep! I actually pictured this hapining in my head, wich means you worded it nicely. BRAVO!!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    it has alot of thought it makes somone think i have thought this deep befor and all of it always makes me relize one thing u have to get on your own

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    That was beautiful!! I'm amazed!! How old were you when you wrote this?

    No matter what anyone says, it's beautiful. :)

  • 1 decade ago

    I LOVE IT, it reminds me of my style of poetry.. maybe im biased.. ..:P beautiful tho.

  • 1 decade ago

    DEEP...

    u've got talent...

    dont stop writing...

  • 1 decade ago

    Impressive is all I can say.

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.