How or should I address this with the school?

Hi, I would set up a meeting with the principal and the teacher and then when you meet with them tell them you want to know why your childis getting "easier" work. Tell them you know some other parents who have kids in the same grade that are coming home with different papers than your child. When they tell you about the slowe class to catch up, tel them that it is unacceptable for them to go about this without consulting you or discussing your son's progress with you. Tell them about his grades last year and how you don't feel he needs this because he is zipping through the papers.

I personally think it's outragious for them to make this judgement for your son without any bases or testing and without notifying you or consulting you.

My youngest son is in 3rd grade and his class is working on miltiplication the second week of school. He has been coming home with papers where they have like pictures showing 4 groups of 2 and then the child has to write 4 X 2 = and figure the answer using the picture. They are teaching grouping whic is the begining of multiplication. Not just that BUT my son does have a learning disability. He was diagnosed in first grade and gets a lot of special help at school with the specialists and my son is STILL coming home with the multiplication work. My son still struggles with addition and subtraction but they keep him moving and then he sees the math specialist 3 days a week to work on his skills.

Don't let this go because if your son doesn't need to the slower pace work then he will fall behind for no reason and will get bored with it. Follow through and if they isnist he needs it then tell them you want to see evidence and how they came to this conclusion.

Often at the beginning of the year they will spend a few weeks doing refresher work and it's a good way for the teacher to gauge what strengths and weaknesses each child possesses. I would schedule a meeting with the teacher and get all of this off of your chest. I would not however mentiond that you were told he was in a "slow group", but I would ask if all students are on the same learning level. Mention that he seems to breeze through his homework quickly and you wondfer if he is challenged enough. Take that time to also mention how busy you are and that you would love to help in ways that your schedule allows. Communication is the key and if you feel your concerns are not being addressed by the teacher, go up the cahin of command, principal, school board etc. one at a time until you are satisfied. Good luck!

If your son is diagnosed ADHD then he should be on the case load for special services in your public school. Each state has a certain level of autonomy when it comes to regulating their Special Education Department, but generally a student with a defined special need will have an individual learning plan in place which involves quite a number of people in the district to be a part of, including the parents. In the state I live in the plans are called IEP's (Individualized Education Programs), but some states use different letters to refer to them. You should be able to request a review of the IEP at any time as does an educator have the ability to request a review. One of the difficulties I see with your approach to communicating is the surroundings you are using. A principal loading busses is busy with the task at hand and may come off as distracted as he/she is. This type of question or comment of an important issue done in the busyness of the day rarely is satisfactory to either party. It is going to be difficult with your schedule, but I think making a specific appointment with the principal as well as asking for an individual conference with his own teacher will give the situation a more focused atmosphere to ask questions and seek clarification. I don't think what the one teacher you are friendly with told you should be brought into the mix as it was extremely unprofessional and inappropriate. Her knowledge is only of surface facts without an insight to the complete picture. If the individual, private meeting with the principal or the individual conference with his teacher does not produce the answers and information you feel comfortable with, then requesting a review of your son's IEP would be appropriate to pursue. It helps in meetings with teachers and administrators to write down your specific concerns before going into the meeting. It helps you focus on the issues at hand and you can prioritize them so the most important are discussed first than if you don't get through the list you won't feel as though you accomplished nothing. Children are routinely placed in various groups based on ability and not every situation warrants a parent's notification if the placement is producing the desired outcomes. It is very important to be involved with your student's school and it sounds as if you are doing an excellent job staying connected. It may be that your expectations of what you should be told are higher than his teacher feels are necessary or has the time to communicate. It's unfortunate in many settings, school as well, that when things are going well than there is little communication, but when things are difficult that is when the communication steps up. If a face-to-face conference with the principal or the teacher just doesn't fit into your schedule or their's perhaps a phone conference at your lunch hour or perhaps in the evening would work.

1. Yes. Sort of. Give them the chance to communicate with you now. It may not be that they could not tell you, but more like they were hiding it from you. Which is absurd. He is your child. Take a day off work and visit the school or request an after hours meeting with his principal and/or teacher.

2. Don't bring her into it, don't say "I was told" just demand they tell you what is going on. Ask that he be tested. Contact a tutoring center, and ask them to evaluate him and then you can enroll him in tutoring if need be.

It sounds like they are assuming he has special needs or they do not want to deal with him. Maybe he doesn't pay attention or behave the way they want him to in the class, but regardless, you should have known this by now. Something similar happened to my sister. They did not tell her her daughter was taking speech therapy at school, they had not checked her file, where it was stated she had a medical condition causing her communication problems and had been in therapy. They just treated her like she was stupid.

Yes, definitely address this. The ideas suggested already are very good (such as making an appointment with his regular teacher and starting there). What I am answering to tell you is that, unfortunately, parents who are concerned, such as yourself, tend to be the exception rather than the rule. Therefore, teachers and school administrators tend to make decisions about students with little or no input from the parents, usually because they have to. But then what happens is they don't know how to react when you, as a concerned parent, really want to be involved.

You wouldn't think so, but involved parents have to fight to continue to have a say in many schools these days. I am not saying the schools are bad by any means, but they just have few enough parents that we must continually speak up (and SHOUT) to get what we want for our children because we do know them best.

I'd address it. In fact, I'm sitting here wondering why it's being hidden from you to begin with. Whether he needs it or not, you should know. They even had an opportunity to tell you when you approached them and they did not. Did your friend say WHY she's not supposed to tell you?

I'd say in an email (ie., in writing) to an administration (c.c. his teacher), "... since we are in week 5 of school and my son is still bringing home first grade work, my logical conclusion is that he is in a remedial setting/class. Can you confirm this?"

Once they confirm, then address the deceit. Also find out why. It's possible he needs it, but that's not whats raising red flags here. If they deny he is in a catch-up class, and again I'm really stumped by that, if you're sure he is, take it up with the superintendent. Tell him you know your son is in a remedial class because you are friendly with a teacher who confirmed it. I don't think you're going to have to divulge her name. Her name is not the point. It has nothing to do with the issue.

Good luck.

Gee, are you saying there is hypocrisy in politics? WHAT A SHOCK! Actually, Obama did go too far with supplying lesson plans complete with questions for the teachers to ask the students. Particularly with the question "How can you help the president." But I think it is clear the LPs are just suggestions, and they changed the clearly inappropriate question so I just wish these on the far right would just drop it. Speaking of hypocrisy in politics, if I remember correctly, the liberals were not happy with Bush speaking to the kids either. It seems like paranoia exists on both sides.

First off, Take a deep breath. Second call the school and say something like,"I can't help but notice, my son's homework seems a bit "too easy" for the grade level he's in And one of the neighbor kids showed me his third grade work. Is there something your not telling me? or do you feel that he's "too slow" to do the regular math work?"

OK, there may not be an actual "other third grade kid" but if they ask who, just say it's a neighborhood kid and leave it at that. Good luck mom!

well for one if he were going to be put in a slower class because they felt he needed the extra help this is something that should have been discussed with you in the first place.. if i were you i would set up a conference with all of his teachers,if he has more than one, AND the principal..and you need to tell them hey that if something is going on with your child whether good or bad you would like to be informed.. it sounds like this school has a problem communicating with parents.. i would definitely not disregard this matter..

Make an appointment for you and your husband to see his classroom teacher first, for an explanation of what they have planned for your child and how he is doing.

It was very unprofessional of your supposed friend, the teacher, to give you out this information. There is a code of conduct for teachers, of confidentiality, so I'm so sad she violated this.

Where I am from, there is usually widespread testing done at the grade three level, to see where the kids are at, so you could also inquire as to whether this will be done. Usually it would have been done the end of grade one as well. These are standardized tests, not on class work.

As to the ADHD, I just would hope that he has been correctly diagnosed (brain scan, nutritional assessment, blood tests, psychological testing - all done by specialists), not just by a behaviour checklist.

Good luck.