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is this sentence too flowery?
it's a long story but here's the sentence: Religion was still a substantial part of their lives, but they realized it was just a cornerstone in the grand arch of life.
I'm comparing and contrasting three biographies of early American life. I have a new teacher and idk if he likes metaphors or if he thinks it sounds pretentious. thnx in advance
3 Answers
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
I think if you replaced 'cornerstone in the grand arch of life', you would make it more formal, but I don't think anyone would be that picky.
It's fine- trust your initial judgment, and leave it how it is! =]
- Anonymous1 decade ago
could be better. how about this?
While still acknowledging religion as significant, they realized that in the grand scope of things it was actually only one part.
eh that's not great either, but I think "grand arch of life" in your sentence doesn't really make sense.
- A.V.R.Lv 71 decade ago
Religion was a substantial part of their lives, but it was still just a part.
