Difficult 8 Year Old Daughter?

Does she go out to play with her friends or is she always inside?

She sounds very much like I was as a child. While having 2 very loving parents I was unable to socialise in a normal way, i was extremely bossy and controlling in everything i did with my peers and ended up with very few friends through my childhood.

In counselling as an adult I came to see that although i was loved, i felt very little control over my own life. I felt controlled by teachers, peers and yes my parents, so i tried to be in control at every opportunity i got.

Having 2 children of my own now (ages 8 and 10) I do find myself trying to control things in an attempt to make their lives better than mine. It is hard as a loving and caring parent to let children control their own lives and can be difficult to take a step back and let them make mistakes. It could be that your daughter has just become too dependant on you and is therefore struggling with asserting her Independence.

Try not to obsess about her behaviour, but try to encourage her to see things from other perspectives. Find out what her teachers think as well. My 8 year old daughter has challenging behaviour and after 5 years she is now being assessed for AD HD and it is her teachers that have done this for me.

I am currently studying child behaviour and intend to work with the behaviour support team in the future. If you want to discuss this a little more then please feel free to e-mail me. jaedaikir@yahoo.co.uk

Okay, I was going to ask if she was an only child, but you supplied that.

You have to consider things, you've just had a baby and probably supplied that baby with a lot of attention. Her clinging to you and whatnot might be her way of spending time with you.

Most children, when a new baby comes along, tend to be clingy or needy because they've suddenly been put from the only child and the center of the parents love and affection to having to share the spotlight.

At home, try and do special little things, where it's only you and her. Like reading or playing, something like that. At the same time, try to include her in the baby activities. Like feeding or even handing the baby a bottle or a pacifier. She'll feel a lot better over that if she's included.

You have to remember, if the baby is 6 months old, she's had over 7 years of being an only child. Only children[unless they were raised around other kids] have a harder time learning how to share and whatnot, and it might not occur to her that being bossy and whatnot is wrong.

Try to get her into things that have to be group activities, and she'll eventually get used to sharing the spotlight with her peers.

I'm not a docter but it kind of sounds like OCD. I'm not saying it is but it is worth talking to a docter- not a family doctor a specialist or someone like that. Repeating words, doing things in a certain routine that she can't seem to get out of. When she gets up is her morning routine done the exact same way? Don't take my advice on this, it's just what it sounds like to me.

relatively of yelling, attempt dropping your voice. it is going to in all probability take each thing you have, by way of fact you would be offended/disenchanted/etc., regardless of the indisputable fact that it is going to capture her interest. young toddlers at that age (and ongoing from there) tend to increase relatively on the instant, and that they are going to combat purely for the sake of battling, by way of fact they opt to be top and assert themselves as being self sustaining from you. So in case you reside calm, she has much less to construct on. while she will enhance her voice, purely enable her understand which you at the instant are not up for it (back, in a quiet voice), and walk away. Wait until she cools off until now pursuing it, and don't pursue it if it somewhat is purely a small component. choose your battles--purely considerable issues relatively than daily hassles. She might have faith that she hates you, yet once you constantly love her and tutor her that she will at last recover from that section and as quickly as back be waiting to tutor you that she does love you. it somewhat is available to love somebody and hate them on a similar time (i'm a be sure--i think like that all the time approximately my 2 year previous!). persist along with your weapons on the relatively substantial themes (e.g., her protection, your center values), and attempt to enable some issues go. If it makes her experience like she's being self sustaining by way of fact she gets to do something you are able to dislike (e.g., dying her hair; piercing something fairly harmless), it could avert a larger conflict over something extra extreme and doubtlessly very risky (e.g., going out with an extremely undesirable pal and ingesting). desire this facilitates.

Have you tried or is she involved in any group or organizations such as girl scouts, 4-H,dance lessons etc. Something that involves others in her own age bracket that everyone works as a group and contributes equally.