Opting for adoption after TTC?

I've been TTC for nearly 5 years. My husband and I have considered adoption. The cost for a domestic infant is huge and the wait is several years. The guidelines for international adoption is strict, you have to be a certain age, married a certain time, and it costs quite a bit as well. Domestic adoption for a "special needs" child such as sibling group, older child, or child with developemental, emotional, etc needs is also difficult. You must jump through hoops with the social workers and then you must foster children first. The children you foster may or may not stay with you forever so it's very hard to form the parenting bond with the children from the start. Yes, we've considered adoption, and unless there is another way that we have over-looked, then I don't think adoption will be for us.

I know it can be hard for people to image adopting an older child, or thinking it's too much work, but as an adopted child(when I was 8 years old, my sister was 10) I believe it's worth the wait. It's hard. I am not pretending its easy, but totally worth it. One of my friends was adopted when he was a baby and a month later his mom had a biological child. Everyone always assumed they were twins. LOL. If you truly want children and can't conceive, give those kids a chance. Adopting is a totally amazing gift that a lot of people are not blessed with having that choice. I love my parents more than anything in this world. I have no need for biological parents...I have a mom and dad...Good Luck and don't forget whatever you choose has to be in good faith.

My husband and I are actually throwing this one around too. We have been trying for 3+ years. It's really hard because either way you look at it you will be putting out the big bucks. Fertility treatment is so expensive and you don't know if it will even work. Adoption is expensive and risky too. It's a tough road no matter how you look at it. I Wish I had an answer for you but it's just something you have to sort out.

Good luck!

I am at the two year mark of ttc and am considering other options like adoption or sperm donor. I am only considering this and almost giving up because I will be 39 on Friday. I am scared and running out of money. My husband has a very low sperm count and the ones that are there have poor morphology and motility. we have almost no chance of conceiving naturally, but are still trying. now considering the other options

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you're amazing for considering adoption

Since you have stopped trying to concieve you will probably end up pregnant sometime soon. GOOD luck