How can a girl discover she is a lesbian when she has been in love with a man and enjoys sex with men?

I'm sorry you where left for another woman.

the short answer is yes, some women even get married and have kids before they figure it out. And its more about the connection with the person than the sex. Its not strange that she enjoyed sex with a man because biologically both sexes are wired to enjoy that stimulation. So i don't think you are missing anything, you just had what sounds like a really tough break.

Our sexual identities are not like little boxes that we fit into. It is like a spectrum, like the color band. You are a person who has a sensual appreciation for your own gender. While you may or may not ever choose to act on that appreciation, there is nothing wrong with enjoying the beauty and eroticism of the female. I would not be worried about this at all. I love looking at other women. I get very turned on by the same things guys do like their legs, their hips, etc. Being a girl is wonderful. Being a girl who likes other girls is twice as nice. :)

She won't be lesbian, a lesbian is not interested in men and much less enjoys sex with them. She may be bisexual, or she may be looking for an excuse to end a relationship she has with that man. Either way, she will not be lesbian.

maybe she never enjoyed sex with a man and always imagined women with her instead of that man. if she says shes a lesbian than she is i know it could be hard but u have to accept it

I know before I discovered myself and finally gave into the feelings I had been fighting all my life, I always imagined that the man I was with was actually a woman. That mere image helped me to,uh, get over the hump so to speak. I rarely finished with penetration and found myself to be quite an actress when I needed to be, to uh, get things over with. She has probably had these feelings her entire life. So the line, "It's not you, it's me" probably fits here. Don't beat yourself up, there are plenty of straight women out there. She could quite possibly end up being one of your closest friends.

She's probably bi. Or maybe she didn't really enjoy being with men. Lots of women lie about that before they come out.

Maybe she wasn't in love and pleasure from sex is pretty mechanical. If they are hitting the right spot, it doesn't matter whi is doing it, it's gonna feel good. She could be confused or bisexual or whatever.

Maybe she enjoys the emotional connection with women

you should know a true lesbian will never sleep with a man or falls in love.....a true lesbian just ask a gay will they sleep with a girl duh.....this girl of yours is not a lesbian....shocking truth is she is not satisfied with what she is experiencing...

shes straight, she just curious about women and decided to take action

i love how people can magically change from straight to gay or bisexual and then if you ask them about it they say some think like

"she was never really straight"

typical case where bi-curiosity goes a bit too far