Have you ever sold the kidneys from a couple of friends you can't stand?....?

You read my mind! Got them on Craig's List right now ..... Really need the cash, cuz 'it's the most wonderful time of the year ... ding, dong, ding, dong' ...........

Why do you want to know this. Are you conducting a survey so that you can quote obscure statistics at German dinner parties.

"Mmmmm nice sausages Hans, did you know that 67 out of 89 answerers that expressed a preference would not admit to having sold the kidneys of their associates and of those 67 12 had then offered holidays in Dubrovnik to their victims?"

" Yes Gunter, these are the finest sausages of the 482 sausages i have eaten this week. The fascinating statistic that you espouse puts me in mind of a joke I heard about dust"

It was a dark and dusty night. The dusty kidneys lay in their dusty bin, soon to be sold to Dusty Sbervozvrotnizch, a dust sweeper at the dusty Serbian Mafia headquarters. Suddenly, the door flew open, scattering the dust particles. The Stazi screamed "Hande hoch, schnell, mein Gott, was ist es mit dem Staub???" The dusty kidney thieves raised their dust covered hands and surrendered the dusty kidneys without resistance. The Stazi "Operation Dust Up" was complete.

Not to the Serbian mafia the language barrier was causing problems but I'm currently in negotiations with the Brazillian Mafia...... tickets to Dubrovnik not a bad idea........... but i need more than two ......... you see i do this on a daily basis i usually just give them vouchers to selfridges..............

I tried but the Mafia said it was damaged goods

No, but after applying lots of Icy Hot, I snipped out those little giants with all deliberate speed, and they make excellent free weights for my low impact aerobics!

yeah, but it wasn't a birthday gift it was a Christmas present

Yes. Funnily enough I never heard from them again...

I did that!

Unfortunately they returned with stickers on their butts.

that said, "Poets!!! Of course you know this means WAR!!"

"Friends you can't stand" is an oxymoron, you oxymoron!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxymoron