Valentine's Day, is it not a good day for poetry?

Oh my gosh! Sock a tease! Excellent!

You should be writing lyrics for musicals. This is very Gilbert & Sullivan.

However, I find the second stanza very unsatisfying. The rhythm doesn't work, esp. in the second half. You may want to get rid of "and metaphor," or at least change it to "metaphor and simile." The "ee" sound is much more open and has more positive connotations---"whee!", "glee," "reverie," etc.---and thus the possibility of better, more appropriate rhymes. The "for" of metaphor is much too closed and has too many negative connotations: "whore," "chore," "gore," etc.

Also "loneliness" and "tenderheartedness" are too far away from each other to be a rhyme that stands out, partly because the rhyme is weak as it is, relying only on "ness" to do the job. All the other sets of three rhymes have two syllables in common---and they're more clever/fun anyway. "Roses" and "expose," because they're approximate, again don't live up to the standard of the other two stanzas and their rhymes. Besides, the second stanza really should have the same AAABAAAB scheme the others have (or, more properly, CCCDCCCD). I don't, however, see much of a problem with "you" and "to"; in fact, the "to" surprises the reader---and, I have to admit, an imagined listener. For me there's just no escaping the poem's song lyric quality.

The other stanzas are perfect, though!

And find a composer you can collaborate with on a musical! Give my regards to Broadway!

i think of your poem is astonishing. I wrote one for my female chum: So even with the undeniable fact which you made your self come from lust So even with the undeniable fact which you acted such as you have been riped from the sands of time So even with the undeniable fact which you inspired ecstasy interior the eclipses of solar And made veiled sin like immortality reminiscent I pledge my soul to you so very grand i such as you from yet another stay i such as you very so like the angels and that i would be St. Valentine

It has a good balance of levity and sincerity. Excellent rhymes too.

I bet it made you special lady friend smile.

The heck with getting your feet wet, jump in! This is good!!! Would like to read more from you, this teases..

The rhythm in this is phenomenal!

Sorry I missed it...thanks for the second nudge.

ma

"O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!'

He chortled in his joy."

--Lewis Carroll

This is great!

And why again have you not posted any other poems?

A lesson in literature....

Yes, this isn't what I would have expected from you.

Well done, very well done.