should i feel like this??? new mum to #1..........?

Firstly, I want to congratulate you on the safe arrival of your new little one. Ok, now listen. I admit i'm no doctor and im not here to say others are wrong when they say you have baby blues but your partner isnt helping you sweetheart, not like he should and he also isnt bonding with the baby either what with going out so soon. If anyone thinks that a baby brings people closer I disagree.. what it will do is unite you if you are a good unit or it can push you apart because a newborn is one hell of a responsibility and a huge commitment, a life commitment that along with the love you (will) feel, comes hard tiring times, sleepless nights, tantrums, cries, etc etc.. they are so demanding and on your own is obviously going to be more difficult.

You need to voice your concern with your partner. Whether your 'used to it' or not hun, now you need to put your guard down and say 'i want your help and I need your help, your input and your support'..Im awful for tiring myself out and doing everything wanting no interference or help from any other, and to be like that is real hard to accept help because it can make you feel like a bit of a failure or that your not capable in some way. I've grown to realise that accepting or asking for help makes you a stronger person.. you shouldnt need to do this alone if you have a partner. and if thats what he intends to be, a partner to you and a daddy to your baby then he needs to support you, both of you.

I think the way you feel toward your baby is a sign of slight postnatal depression,, this can be real tough and its really important that you talk about it whether it be with a friend, a family member or a doctor - take each day at a time and dont beat yourself up for not feeling like there is a bond with you and your baby just yet. Thousands of Mums feel that way. There is such a huge expectation that when you see your baby for the first time it will be love at first sight and you will feel a huge bond. So obviously if you dont feel this way its very disheartening and you worry thinking that its 'abnormal' in some way which will bring yourself down even further.

Having a newborn is a huge deal and sometimes, alot of the time, new Mums struggle terribly if they dont feel the way the 'think' they should or how 'every other mum feels' more women feel like you do than maybe you think so give yourself a hug, and remind yourself how well your doing. Your not only battling with feeling low after giving birth but your relationship is also a very lonely one where you have a partner .. but then again you ask yourself if you do ?? -

If it were just baby blues hun then i'd understand and agree if your partner was supportive and caring toward you and you were having help and feeling loved. But your not getting that, your not getting the tlc you so badly deserve and that can make you feel like complete sh**... excuse my language. I just cant bare the thought that your asking yourself if your losing your mind.. Look at all you do.. look at your gorgeous baby.. and realise 'its you' that has created that perfect little being, you that nurtured and carried that baby and its you that that baby needs... its you that is keeping everything ticking.. and what are you getting in return? right now it feels like nothing.. so it is more than understandable how your feeling... your not losing your mind or your marbles or anything else for that matter.. your a new Mummy who is pretty much exhausted and has no support.

My advice is to talk talk talk... to anyone.. but you also need to talk to your partner out right.. if there are underlying issues and the relationship isnt working for whatever reason then thats something that you will both need to work on.. but you must tell him how you are feeling. Soon enough you will know if he is listening and if he isnt then you need to take care of number one and number one... you and your baby.

Good luck, I really hope your able to feel better soon and praise yourself every time you look at your baby and every time you look in the mirror - you've done and still are doing amazing.

Take care xxxx

Sounds like you have the baby blues which is totally normal. Your hormones are all out of whack right now, so you can't help the way you feel. It certainly doesn't help that you don't have a supportive partner. Don't worry, you will develop a bond with your baby....he is only 12 days old, so give it some time. When I first had my son, my husband and I both said it just felt like we were babysitting for an extended period of time...LOL Because your partner is not giving the extra support you need right now, you should speak with your doctor about how you feel and let him/her put you at ease. If this feeling continues it could lead to post pardom depression.

what i did and what helped me was, asking for help.

plain and simple. dont be affraid to ask for help!

The laundry, dishes, vauuming and all that other stuff can wait a day or 2!

When ur baby is up, spend some time with him laying down with him. Talk to him, sing him a song, kisses and silly faces. Yuo have to learn to just forget about the world and focus in what is important, u and ur baby. When u feel like cleaning every inch of ur home while ur little one is sleeping, u should be sleeping. Always try to sleep when he sleeps. Turn the baby monitor on, put the other end in the bathroom with u so u can hear him, and take a bath or a shower and relax.

ur not losing ur mind. u have a lot on ur plate and it shouldn't be like that. I'm sorry ur partner doesn't help out but that just means more love for ur baby. its natural for u to feel like this after baby is born. I was so over whelmed with emotion and exhaustion when my girl was born. I learned to ask for help (mother in law lived up the street at that time), I waited to do laundry so I could sleep for an hour or 2. u have to give urself a chance! this is just the beginning!

good luck and god bless

Honey, sounds like you have a case of the blues. It happens. It is hard. One minute your pregnant and anticipating the new bundle. The next its here and you are like holy **** I am a mom. Take it from a mom of two, it does get better. If you feel any thoughts of harming yourself or your child please seek medical attention. It really does get better.

Also when it comes to the commitment of your partner, kick him to the curb. The baby is number one in your life right now. You can do this. Keep your chin up

Sounds exactly like post partum blues. You can still reason things in your mind but your feelings just don't catch up to what your mind says you should feel. Let your doctor know you have the blues and if you have someone, possibly another female who understands, you can talk to until you feel better. Things will get better, just hang in there.

This is my first youngster..I felt a few flutters/bubbles at round eleven weeks..Only felt them two times even as laying/sitting in an ungainly role. Felt them plenty sooner or later while I was once looking television on my stomach at 14 weeks. I wish I shall be in a position to think them continually quickly! (with out laying on my stomach)

need to call your dr and get in sound like you have post partum depression or the baby blues you need to get on some meds to help you. Good Luck

It sounds like you have postpartum depression. Talk to your ob/gyn. They will know the right treatment. Hang in there. It'll pass.

yes call the dr, get in fast...