How to convince brother in law's gf that having a preemie baby is bad?!?

Unfortunately, she isn't going to listen to anything you have to say. Look up the symptoms of a sociopath... I'm sure she fulfills the criteria. The only thing you can do is inform CPS of her drug and alcohol use, let them know you are concerned for the baby and her ability to care for a baby. This way they can investigate while the baby is still in the hospitals care. I don't know how large the town is where you live, but, you can let the nurses in your birthing class know that she may be delivering there and to be prepared.

good call on the munschausen syndrome--- that's a serious thing to watch out for when the baby does arrive

I don't think there is anything you can do or say to this girl. She obviously needs CONSTANT attention. The sad thing is that if she has a preemie baby and the baby has health issues she knows she'll get attention for that even though its her unfortunate lifestyle that would bring this on to the baby. I have a feeling when the baby does get here it will only be a tool for attention and tantrums. This girl is not mentally stable and really there is nothing youc an do to convince her of anything...her distorted thinking is perfectly logical in her head. What you may want to do is see if there is steps your brother can take in order to get custody of his baby...unless he too is unstable in which maybe your parents can get involved. Its really a sad situation because this girl would rather have an unhealthy baby to take any possible attention away from you. There's nothing cute or exciting about having a premature baby. Its often hard and heart breaking for parents that go thru it and a struggle for the baby often. She's stupid and its bothersome that so many people want kids and can't get pregnant while nutcase druggies like that can get pregnant every other month if they choose ...UGH. Good luck to your family...with this chick you'll need it.

...and your main concern should be yourself and your own pregnancy.

She may or may not be making the same decisions you would make, or even smart decisions, but she is an adult and sadly, there is nothing you or anyone else can do to make her change.

Yes, its frustrating because at this point she isn't the only one being hurt by her choices, that baby is too, but again, she's the only one that can control that. And honestly, hasseling her about stuff may make it worse.

From what I've seen through life is that hypochondriacs (possibly spelled wrong) are usually up for anything that will get them attention. So the more attention you give to her bad eating habits, lack of weight gain, drugs and drinking, the more she will do it.

I would just ignore her.

But don't think you know what's best for her situation either. Its between her and her doctor, and if the doctor has concerns he will deal with them. Its just not your place.

And if it makes you feel better I am 36 weeks along (almost 37...about to pop) and have only gained 10 pounds the entire pregnancy. Everyone is different.

I may be off but it sounds has though she needs a mental medical intervention. But unfortunately there is nothing you can do at this moment...except tell her doctor you suspect her of using drugs while pregnant, they will test her. I don't know about where you live but here if you go into premature labor they will automatically test you. They will then call Child Protective services. Don't be afraid to call them yourself if you see any of this when the baby does come. But it sounds like if she is doing all of this now she will have a preemie..I am actually kind of blown away that she wants a preemie...she sounds as if she could have Munchhausen by Proxy....this is a serious mental disorder where a person will hurt themselves or others to gain attention. I think I miss spelled it. I really hope this helps. Good luck.

Wow! She sounds very messed up! I have a feeling you aren't going to be able to convince her that having a preemie is bad. The only thing I can think of is if you are able to have her talk to parents of preemies or take her to see a NICU. You won't be able to go inside it and see the babies up close but you could probably peek through the windows and see them. It sounds as if she has some major entitlement issues and needs a shrink! Good luck and congrats on YOUR pregnancy! Hope things go well for you!

wow that girl has aloootttt of issues she needs to fix... serious issues.

this girl needs to realize her baby being preemie isnt good for it and puts it through alot of procedures that are scary to the baby... and plus if it preemie she wont get to take it home for a while! why would she want that.?? i think thats crazy... i mean ive heard of ppl wanting a small baby,...a baby thats healthy and born on time... but a preemie??

she has alot to learn.

you should show her the videos on youtube of babies born at 6 -7 months...that way she can see what there is to go through,.. and sometimes..not every baby lives.so it seems lke with what all she is harming her body with she could lose this baby too...and if it is born preemie it will probably have more problems than it just being preemie.

do all you can to prove her that preemies are not something she should try to have... and help her eat right and find a way for her to get off the drugs and all the stuff she does that harms her and the baby.

btw...whats her family doing?? do they even care or seem to know whats going on with her??

i hope she gets help and her and the baby are ok..and she gives birth on time,..

god bless srry if my answer was no good help.

btw you should call CPS and let them know whats going on so they can try to help her too...

she knows she is jsut a fool . poor baby . i would inform child protection about her I dont think she can make her baby come early

i am sure her dr it wise to her if not call them

WOW ...

Maybe as a good citizen that you are maybe turn her in for child endangerment .

She does not deserve to have a baby.

That girl sounds like a hot mess!! Shouldn't your brother in law be with your sister anyway not a gf? Well anyway, all you can do is worry about you & your baby, not hers.