i need comebacks for my brother!!!?

get up and go to the potty and ask him if he needs some toilet paper when he says no why ? then say cause you may need to wipe your mouth cause nothing but crap is coming out.

LOL that was a good one sunny. Look I have the same exact problem. My brother always picks on me but you can say something like " who are you provoking? A little kid? A powerless who provoques a powerfull is an idiot,but a powerfull who provoques a powerless is a coward and and idiot.

Or you can go oldschool and say

You know, no one likes you... Not even mom and dad, you came from a ripped condom. You Unwanted surprise

i have a 2 brothers and we fight about the stupidest things,but over the years i have come up with sum stuff.

kinda stupid though.

1. whats that ugly thing on your face?oh,wait,that IS your face!

2. yeah,well at least I dont pretend im the new brad pitt

3. you smell like a cow that has decomposed 5 years mixed with the stuff you find in a septic tank that hasnt been emptied in 50 years.

You need to write a lil clearer so i can understand you. if you want ppl to come up wit ur jokes you'll never come up wit ur own then you'll always get picked on. i'll give you some but u have to be creative and make up your own.

1. he's a douchebag and only can pick on someone younger if he pick on someone older than him he'll get beat up

2. he has no gf bcuz he's ugly

I don't know I am very tired and bored so i can't think of anything.

This will probably sound really stupid but it sound like your brother is jealous of you. He is probably trying to hurt you cause it makes him feel better. So if you ignore him and don't give him a reaction he will be really upset. When I was your age and people would say ignore it I thought that was stupid but its not just try it.

try using a parody of "yo mama jokes" and try "you are so" jokes like these:

your so fat you have to wear a wide load sign.

your so old you sit behind jesus in the yearbook.

your so old, youwere around when burger king wa still a prince.

Also you cound try Aha jokes.com look up yo mama jokes and replace the words," yo mama" with "you are so".

i also have a brother and i also make fun of him 1 tell him he's so ugly he turned madusa into stone 2 i tell my bro that we adopted him from a zoo hope it helps

Tell him that your mom only likes him because retards need friends too.

Tell them:

They flew over the cuckoo nest to get to your house.

Tell them to stop bullying you. Tell your mom or dad that it hurts your feelings and it has to stop.

Instead of all the silly comebacks why don't you just tell him to grow up & act his age not yours