Is this about right, Christians?

way to be original.

Mr. Spouter,

I enjoyed reading your very brief comical satire of God Almighty’s plan of redemption. I especially note how you point out the technical correctness of labeling the Risen Savior as a zombie. You are clearly a talented thinker and writer. However, I will not pretend that you actually expect to receive an answer that will persuade you to embrace Christianity and the hope that it offers. Nonetheless, I will answer your question and I hope that it will help someone that reads it.

As I pointed out, you are technically correct that the risen Jesus Christ is a zombie. I’ve never actually thought about it like that before, but I see your point. But think about it… if a man, indeed the Son of God, were killed unjustly by the very people that He came to set free and was later resurrected from the dead by the power and authority of God Himself, is it not worth considering that He did it all for you as He said He did? And if you don’t consider it, where is your hope?

Yes, the sacrament of communion is a symbol of the body of Christ that was broken and His blood that was shed for the remission of sins. It is not something that Christians take lightly; it is a practice that we administer out of obedience and remembrance. The sacrament of communion does not, as you imply, cleanse any evil instilled by a talking snake or otherwise. It is a sacrament, a very important ritual of all Christians, but it does not make anyone righteous. Only faith in the atoning work of Jesus Christ saves anyone from their sin.

If anyone reading this would like to speak with me further, please contact me.

Child, before you dare criticize a religion, you must first do some research; as I see it, you know nothing about Christianity and is not equipped or qualified to discuss it. In fact, you are a very stupid individual.

Not what I believe at all, but I'm no mainstream Christian. Well, except that even most mainstream Christians won't agree with you. Why are you here? Are you looking for some kind of enlightenment, or just a way to spread your bias and unkind character?

I heard that 5 years ago. ORIGINALITY FAIL.

Actually a growing number of Christian believe Genesis is allegorical, and Jesus is an Undead not a mindless zombie. Do not you know the difference?

You don't have to believe. That's ok by me. But disrespect and effrontery- there's no excuse for that. Do get a life.

If you want to be taken seriously, don't ask about a zombie. Jesus is not a zombie.

No George Carlin. That's not what I believe.

It's much deeper and more complex than that.

've got it wrong.

It's:

"The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree."

No offense to Christians

Edit: Thumbs down? I was only correcting him, because his quote was wrong. Like I said, I have nothing against Christians.

Well, you understand the Bible as well as the average idiot does.

That doesn't say much about you.

By the way, I am not a Christian. Not even religious.

somebody got the sci-fi channel for passing their special education class!