husband wants to cheat, what do i do?

Be grateful that you have an open and honest relationship and that your husband feels comfortable talking to you about this. This is a really good time to start a dialogue about why he is fantasizing about your ex-best friend. See where the conversation takes you. Try not to judge him too harshly - he hasn't cheated, and he did tell you that he was fantasizing (thinking) about it.

Wow.

My hunch is that's him saying that he has major issues with himself, you and where your marriage is at, and that he's frustrated and almost at a dangerous point of adultery. The fact that he told you, rather than simply go and try to find things about you and your behaviour that make you a poor spouse in his view (which would be an attempt to justify him leaving you), says to me that he wants to work things out.

Couples Counseling is the way to go as marriage relationships are tricky and we bring in baggage from our past experiences that we may not be aware of. Some of the stuff can be explosive, so it's best to have someone trained in this to create a safe and equitable space for each person to vent, speak their mind, confess, and all those other things that one has to do when negotiating a relationship. Superficially, there's a need in him that is not being met by you, whether that expectation of you meeting his need on his part is justifiable or not.

Talk to pastors and ask them to give you three marriage counselor references each that they would themselves use if they had issues - use the one that comes up the most.

That kind of question is kinda difficult to answer because it really depends on how you feel about infidelity. Why does he feel like he needs to cheat on you? Has the spark moved out? How open are you sexually with your husband? Are you willing to open up your mind (and body) to new experiences with or without your husband?

not is exactly the time to talk about this and find out why he wants to cheat on u, if u don't talk about it, that's when it happens. just because someone knows something is wrong doesn't mean that they won't do it. if u don;t deal with this now u will be dealing with it in the future at some point. u may not have to divorce him he may divorce u. u fight for whats yours unless he no longer loves u. the woman must be pursuing him, and he must be struggling with it.

Ask him to seek counseling with you. If he does commit adultry against your marriage and God then you will have means to a

divorce where you can find someone else who will love and respect you. He'll get your ex-friend and they'll last a short while till he realizes what he has lost and you can go on with your new life.

Pray for him.

WOW, you love this man to death and there's nothing wrong with that, but to say it's going to happen anyway and you are still going to be with him is amazing. Women like you have to start loving yourself better then that. You are probably the best thing that has ever happen to him and he does not care. But since you are going to stay with him anyway because you love him soooo much, ask him for a threesome that won't push him away. I feel sorry for you, this is sad.

Let him know that if he's serious you two might as well file for divorce now...unless he's willing to attend couples counseling to figure out what the real issue is and fix it.

Why cheat when that'll likely end the marriage anyway? Why not just divorce, then legally and morally screw whomever he wants? At least then he wouldn't be a cheater.

People (like him) are so stupid.

Why would you want to be with a guy who wants to cheat on you with someone who used to be your best friend?

leave him if hes thinking about cheating and he willingly told you he does not care how you feel and that something you don't want if he tells you what hes gonna do then you should leave him you deserve better

HE told you that he was thinking about this. Not doing this, thinking about it. Which means he recognizes he has an issue. He's probably already trying to push her out of his mind.