thoughts on 'adoption' reform?

Need to start a nonprofit organization with a strong agenda for change and to overpower NCFA.

The current adoption industry may need to be taken down before quality change will happen.

1) No falsified documents. A Certificate of Adoption can be just as recognized as a legal document as A Certificate of Birth. There should be no reason to create fraud of one document when a separate and different document can be just as easily recognized as legal and bounding.

2)No pre-birth matching or surrendering a child at birth. Adoption should not even be allowed to be presented until AFTER a mother has given birth and tried parenting first. It should be illegal for a woman to have any contact whatsoever with an adoption agency or p-aparents, while she is pregnant or within the first couple months after she has given birth.

3) Equal amount of money and support placed into keeping mother and child together as is dedicated to separating them through adoption. Can you imagine how many families could be saved if all the adoption grants and credits were instead reverted into family preservation?

4)Profits from adoption made illegal, without exception. If there was no profit to be made there would be a drastic change in the coercion and manipulation that exists to convince mothers to give up their children

5) Demolish, execute, and completly erase the NCFA and their counterparts. Why in the hell do we need such a powerful body that fights for more adoptions when it should serve a better purpose to have an equally strong force fighting to help mothers keep and raise their children.

All this was attempted in the late 1970s/early 1980s (Model Adoption Act 1980) but guess who put a stop to it all?

Yep, the adoption agencies (Gladney et al) and industry joined forces to prevent change so, as a result, the rest of the civilized world moved forward and made adoption more humane whilst the USA has lagged WAY behind because the 'industry' there is all about self-preservation and 'free enterprise'

Pfffftttt

7. Stop lying on official documents (IOW, the birth certificate stays intact, and available to the adoptee AT ALL AGES).

6. No pre-birth matching. All options are explored and revisited as appropriate with a professional counselor, parenting, kinship parenting, abortion, adoption.

All this talk about adoption and there's one thing no one is saying. Either none of you have thought of it or none of you want to acknowledge it.

Sometimes birth mothers want nothing more to do with the children they are giving up!!

[And please don't give me the crap about how she's a whore or should take responsibility, yada, yada. Okay we all know that at the end of the day none of this would be happening if we live in a perfect world.]

But the fact of the matter is, it is happening. Giving a child information about a parent who never wanted them and probably never will isn't exactly productive. Personally I feel like when they are old enough and the adoptive parents feel they are mature enough they should be told. Telling a child that your mommy and daddy aren't actually your mommy and daddy and that your real mommy didn't want you isn't the best bedtime story.

And this is just one example. Sometimes these kids are adopted from foster homes where they originally came from crackhead parents, or abuse or whatever. Do you really think it's good that a child knows that so early in life (talking about the ones who would be too young to remember the bad stuff)? Hell of a burden for one so young to bear.

As for everything else you mentioned, like counseling. It all sounds like the same thing that pro-lifers try to push on women considering abortion. The choice is hard enough, do they really need someone subtly telling them what they're doing is wrong?? And what's so wrong with a name change. New family, new life. Why would the child have the surname (if a newborn I'm assuming the birth parents haven't named it) of the person who gave him/her away?

At the end of the day is adoption THAT horrible? I mean considering how bad a child's life can be, growing up in a loving stable household isn't that bad at all. Yes it's hurtful when you initially find out the truth. But a well rounded, adjusted adult will eventually accept it and move on. I would rather see children adopted and not told the truth until they're 18 than see them hopping from foster home to foster home abused and neglected. Or stuck with a parent who never wanted them and they are, again, abused and neglected.

Oh, and I agree that there should be no more profit agencies. I don't agree with people making money off of something like this.