I need ways to suppress a morning erection so I can urinate without contorting like a Cirque du Soleil...?

Can your wife not form a tight seal around your wang with her mouth while you pee?

You are blessed to have such a problem. Many people wish they had a problem like yours. You have received great suggestions below, cold shower, pointing south into the toilet or an open crevice. It is tough when it is so hard to try to pee, but try taking a deep breath and relax while you try to urinate and things may work out. Keep us posted about your dilemma.

Eating lots of leafy greens, whole grains, oysters, watermelon, and blueberries (most any fruit will work, really) will help you give your body all that it needs to improve the quality of your erections, while cutting out processed foods, cigarettes and alcohol will provide further benefits. Read here https://tr.im/yKG2G

Add in a healthy dose of exercise at least three times per week, and you’re well on your way to better sexual health!

Would have preferred to not answer a penis question, but that's pretty much all you're dealing out I see. You need to take a walk through the neighborhood first, say hello to the neighbors and wait for things to calm down. Then it should be smooth sailing.

Be glad,it's a sign of excellent physical health in a man.Every guy has been there.Have a shower,have a shave,it'll relax itself after a few minutes..

I draw great self esteem from my morning 'Ooh Monkfish Aren't You a big boy', If yours is more of an embarrassment for you, just hang large weights on it, If the stretching doesn't work, then there's still the relief from self harming

I am failing to see the reason for the question.

Not only are you getting your early morning exercise but it is a great trick you could be performing at parties...

Sometimes you just gotta make lemonade.

Put a mirror above your bed. In the morning, throw the covers off and have a good long look. If that doesn't kill it, nothing will.

picture a naked fat lunchlady caressing her saggy bosoms with mayo and old cheese. if erection continues....think of santa, with no clothes on...its not so jolly

It may be unmanly, but if you sit down to pee it's a little easier.