Why am I not dateable?

It sounds like you're really getting to know the girls before the question ever comes up, and then the question seems to be a hypothetical, "do you think I'm dateable?" or "would you have ever dated me?" You're waiting too long to bring up the subject, you're letting yourself become unexciting, which in a lot of ways is the same as undateable. Once the girl becomes a friend, that's all she's really ever going to be. Once you're just a nice guy, you're done.

I make no claims that I'm the most successful guy in the world when it comes to this sort of thing, but I've learned from plenty of stupid mistakes. The good news is that if people like you, then it's likely people you haven't met will as well. That's important, confidence and a good sense of humour are some of the best things you can have. The bad news is that if you're interested in someone, you have to ask the question in the first two or three conversations you have, while you're still new, different and exciting. It may be that not all fledgling relationships go well, but if things go that way you're not in the situation of dumping a long time friend, either.

Hi Mate,

I suffer from the same problem. It seems that you are too much of a 'nice guy', You seem charming to a woman, and thus make her feel comfortable. When she is comfortable she resorts more to friendship rather than intimacy. That is why you see a lot of 'tools' aka in America as 'jocks' with stunning women because they can lure women through their sexual prowess and their boorish and rough ways. The trick is to strike the right balance. Still maintain the right balance between being a charmer, but also be slightly alpha-male.

Also I think that you may have not found someone who is right for you. Remember don't change who you are just so you can be with attractive women. The day will come when you realise that you are just p'whipped if you understand what i mean ;). As I said be a charmer, but also be somewhat alpha male. It is a common misconception that preppies are snobs. Many people view them as unapproachable, and as a result mislabel them. I too like the labels of Lacoste and Polo, however I do think woman appreciate more masculine brands to the likes of John Varvatos. That said, it is a pretty hypocritical thing for me to say this, especially because at the end of the day woman are not going to judge you on your personality but on the way you conduct yourself. Whilst I have not presented a solution I hope my words make you feel better about yourself, and hope that you do not associate your slight affliction with women with yourself.

Seems like just bad luck. You probably just make friends with girls too easily. I mean, maybe you get on a girl's friend side instead of their lover side. I think you should try to start flirting more often with the girls you meet and like. And do it quickly, it's not always good to become a girls friend right away. Show your interest almost immediately.

because maybe u need to just go ask a girl out. maybe u hang around too many girls where other girls dont think they have a chance.

my bf didnt get his 1st girlfriend until 19...lol and we been together 2 years, dont trip the girl will come along.

he never found the right girl until me and was never looking. also he just didnt seem like boyfriend material to girls...maybe thats the same with u?? just wait, its not big deal.

Only YOU can answer this question---you are too NEGATIVE--you need to be respectful and courteous and friendly and hang with your own crew that accepts you for yourself. HAVE A PLAN and work on it. College is a bad time to expect a girl to be looking for dates--TOO BUSY getting educated. RELAX--smile--continue to be yourself--you are going to be alright!!

You sound like my husband was at school - the 'joker', the one everyone liked but no-one dated; everyones best mate - attractive, funny, charismatic but not datable

I found him in the end :)

Hang on in there

All I hear in this message is "I, I, I and me, me, me". Perhaps if you stop thinking of yourself as greatest thing since sliced bread your romantic luck might change.

And if you have to ask girls if you're "dateable", trust me..you're not.

the right girl for you hasn't come yet. She will in due time.don't worry

If you can't see your own flaws you may be conceited, just a thought.

depends up on character