Oppositional Defiant Disorder in a 4 year old?

As a parent, you can’t satisfy a child with ODD, since their thinking is irrational. They clamor for your attention and then tell you to leave them alone. The sad truth is, kids with ODD aren’t very likeable. Parents often feel guilty about the fact that they love their kids, but don’t like being around them.

Parents get blamed for their child’s oppositional behavior and tend to heap even more blame on themselves. The parent of a child with ODD often feels incompetent and isolated. They live with the self-imposed shame that other people think they’re bad parents, and that humiliation grows larger as their world gets smaller. Left untreated, Oppositional Defiant Disorder can lead to Conduct Disorder, a more serious pathology that is a precursor for anti-social behavior and criminality.

Of course, for many parents, ODD is not the primary issue. Rather, they are dealing with continuous, low-level defiance that is not incendiary and aggressive, but is aggravating, annoying and disruptive to the family. Whether the defiance has turned into a diagnosis of ODD or has not, the parent’s approach should be the same.

Read more below on How to Stop the War and Restore Peace at Home:

4 Year Old Defiant Behavior

I do understand your delima our daughter is almost 10 and has been diagnosed with oppositional defiance and early onset bi-polar (her bio-mom is bi-polar unfortunately it can be genetic) the unfortunate thing about your situation is most tests that can be performed by a psychologist are not very accurate until at least 8 and even then they don't really recommend until later unless they have extreme behavior issues. One thing they did tell us is all children go through stages and many of those stages can seem very extreme it is when the behavior gets past a 6 month period when it is not longer considered a stage. (That would probably be a longer amount of time for a younger child.) If you do feel she is not within normal behavior limits you may look into therapy geared toward much younger children. You can also find books on oppositional defiance and follow the steps they provide they work just as well on children with out behavioral issues. I am sorry for what you are going through and hope this helps

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Oppositional Defiant Disorder in a 4 year old?

I have always been very leery of 'labeling' a child's behavior issues. I have believed that most children (especially 4 yr olds) are just testing the boundaries and are completely normal.

However, my daughter is VERY defiant and her actions are far beyond 'normal' from what I...

Hi...My grandson's bio father was a meth head...My daughter did NOT use drugs and dropped the father the day she found out (before the child was born) he was using meth and produced a child...Unfortunately, bi-polar, adhd and other behavioral problems are inherited and a drug addicted sperm donor didn;t help my little guy...

He was diagnosed with bi-polar & adhd...And eventually put on medication to help his mood swings...He has an awesome set of doctors who keep up with him and are not looking to over-medicate him to suit society's definition of the perfect child...But his problem was interfering with his schooling, peer relationships, family life, etc...We couldn't even have a pleasant family outing without him dominating the whole activity with his tantrums and ill behavior...He was so miserable and didn't know why...It was really sad to watch because there was no comfort we could give him that helped.

There are natural herbal remedies to aid these problems if you can afford them...We couldn't and my daughter receives Medicaid, so we went with the doctors but only after we researched the alternatives as we didn't want a zombie for a child and told the doctors so...Nor did we want to hurt him in any way...We just wanted him to function beyond his misery and have a chance rather than be a statistic one day.

Do a google for natural remedies for bi-polar & adhd...They have a liquid form which I researched...

They do help somewhat and can be beneficial until she's old enough for some regulated medication to help her mood swings.

God Bless you...You are not alone.

I suggest seeing other doctors to get varying opinions, and maybe a family psychologist. This sounds like you could use the counsel of a therapist more than a diagnosis from a doctor. What your daughter is experiencing could probably be helped through a good family therapist. Really think about it instead of just saying no and sweeping this option under the rug, because in the long run, behavioral help from an expert will be more beneficial to everyone than a short-term solution of medication. It's worth a try. Good luck to you.

I have seen it, and I think you're very perceptive in realizing that this could be a physical problem with her.

In one school where I taught, kids with similar problems were called "chemical casualties" meaning that the parents were substance abusers and passed the problems on to their children. Unfortunately you may have to change your opinion on medication later if it turns out that her behavior isolates her from having friends or results in learning disabilities. I'm NOT a fan of instant medication, but it CAN result in a much happier child. I think you're wonderful to take on this challenge and good luck to you. As far as the inconsolable fits are concerned there are two schools of thought that I have seen. One is to sit with her but ignore her behavior, and the other is to find a safe place to isolate her until she calms herself down

and then instantly reward her with attention when she's behaving appropriately. If the cause of her problems is physical she may not be able to self-control.

I'm sorry that I don't have an answer, but I just wanted to express some support. That is really tough & I wish you the best. You sound like a great & loving parent.

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