Why does the whole SAHM debate ignore what the man may or may not want?

Looks around and wonders about why 'the man' and his spouse haven't settled that issue between themselves. Because generally a SAHM is one because she and her spouse have made that decision, same is true for SAHD.

I don't think it should ignore what men want. There seems to be a rather odd assumption among feminists that all men are yearning for housewives, but in fact I think many men prefer women who are going out to work ansd making money as well as doing all the domestic work etc.

That depends on who is debating. I have heard discussions where both sides made arguments related to men's desires, such as, "Men really value someone nurturing at home who isn't a rival to his sense of being a provider," or "Men really want a woman who can assist him financially, not put all the financial weight on his shoulders."

You have a point. But I'm working because I know my husband wouldn't want to have a wife who only works around the house and not bring money in. I'm just saying that at the end of the day, the husband's opinion matters. At least in my case, that's how it is.

*shrugs* Maybe to narrow down the topic.

If you're talking about the question I posted, in case you want to know, I posted it because I want to know what women think. The core of the subject is how women see it.

It doesn't. The man gets to choose who he marries, and he has the opportunity to discuss and plan with his beloved all the details of how they choose to live their lives together.

It's not like she hands him the ring, says "you're it" and he is forced to come hear to wait instructions from us on how to live his life.