Catholic premarital classes, pre-cana?

You and your future hubby have nothing to worry about. My fiance and are we nervous about it until we got there. You go and sign in and you sit at table and meet other couples. If it the same as the one we attended. They provide you a book with different topics. The go one topic at a time and they explain different ways to make them work in a marriage. For example: Home, Finance, Love, Children. After they talk they made us do an exercise. Like draw a picture, write down are feelings, and talk to other couples to see if they felt the same.

It's a long day but all in all it goes by pretty fast. We came out of there with a new way of dealing with stress and how to handle a conversation with respect.

I'm sure you'll be just fine. Good Luck and Congrats on your up coming wedding!

Pre Cana Questions Asked

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Yes, there is a lot of conflicting information! Here are the facts from the Catholic Church. 1. It's fine to take your premarital classes on the East Coast and then marry in Colorado. The priest who is doing your prep will need to be in contact with his priest in Colorado. 2. Catholic priests generally are not allowed to administer any Sacrament (including Holy Matrimony) at any non-Catholic church or chapel. However, if you mean that it is an ecumenical chapel (all faiths) and not a non-denominational church (as in a Christian sect that claims to be non-denominational but really is a denomination), that is sometimes allowed. Your fiance's priest would have to check with the bishop to see if this location is appropriate. 3. Catholic wedding Masses *always* have Communion, because in any Mass, Jesus is the focal point. However, not all Catholic weddings include the Mass. Frequently when one of the two spouses is not Catholic, there will be the wedding rite without the Mass. 4. If you decide to have Mass, then only Catholics in a state of Grace can receive the Holy Eucharist. Usually the priest will say something about this to all the guests (because there is likely to be more than one non-Catholic among them), often with a prayer that we might all be unified someday so we can share this Feast together. If you have more questions, just ask!

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Catholic premarital classes, pre-cana?

My fiance and I have our premarital class on Saturday. It's an all day even from 8-5.

I have had a few people make me nervous about the class. One couple told me that the host of their class made all the couples fight all day long on purpose.

I was just wondering if anyone had any...

We did a one-weekend class. It was in a large auditorium with couples speaking on a variety of topics that can affect a relationship - religion, finances/money, sex/relationship, and I forget the other two. Maybe family and fighting fair?

The couple ("instructors" I guess?) will get up and speak their little piece, then there's either a discussion or a little quiz that you and your fiance will complete.

Honestly, it wasn't a big deal. It was long and maybe a little boring at times, but overall not an issue and certainly didn't make us fight.

I do know that fighting is a normal, healthy part of a relationship. No you shouldn't be fighting over every little thing but you ARE two different people with two different minds. Your opinions and thoughts aren't always going to be the same. Sometimes you are going to fight...and that's okay! Just fight fair, and be adults. Make sure your fights have a resolution, not just being mad at each other and pushing the issue to the side and "forgetting" it until later.

If Catholics want to marry a non-Catholic Christian or unbaptized person they need to ask permission of their bishop for a dispensation. So, your fiance is going to need to get a letter from the bishop in order to proceed with a Catholic wedding. Normally, Catholic weddings take place inside of a Catholic Church. As always, there are exceptions to the rule. You are also going to need to contact the bishop in regards to that as well. You could always do a non-Catholic ceremony with a J.P. and later get your marriage blessed in the Catholic Church later too. There are typically 3 rites of marriage in the Church, one is a marriage between two catholics, one is a marriage between a Catholic and a non-Catholic Christian and the last is a marriage between a Catholic and an unbaptized person. Typically priests perform marriages when one party is not Catholic without a mass (no communion). This is probably the best with regards to your non-Catholic relatives. You can choose which rite you want when you meet with your priest. If I were you I would contact your fiance's parish ASAP because some parishes require you to let them know at least 6 months before you plan on getting married. The priest will work with you and come up with the best solution for the both of you. I hope this helps.

I've never heard of anyone being coaxed into arguing with their intended. I think that was probably NOT a typical experience.

Most of the people I know are Catholic. Usually, you're asked tons of questions, both together and separately. A married couple (or a few) will do some talking. Issues that typically lead to trouble will be brought up--like money, kids, etc.

This is nothing to be worried about.

I attended one and all it was was a group of couples getting together at this married couples home. We had brunch and then sat around in their living room. It was just long and boring. The only thing I remember about it was the hosts discussing natural family planning and how to use it. Ugh.

the reason people would be fighting is if the classes brought up difficult differences of opinion the two have with each other on vitally important life subjects. if you arent on the same page at the class, you can either learn how to negotiate and listen and agree together on these things, or you can grow apart. better to flush it out before marriage.

when i was very young i went to precana with a fiance. his disrespectful attitude toward the procedure was so shocking to me i did indeed break up with him, thank heavens.

She was probably trying to scare you. We had the same class, luckily, ours was cut short after only an hour. :) We never had to return again! They just do silly games, and take quizzes and put you in small groups to discuss things. If they "make you fight all day long" get up, and walk out.

Your pastor will understand. :)