music_kel

We are Americans moving to the UK in April. We just signed a contract on a house. My husband will be making 42,500gbp. The rent on the house that we are taking is 1430gbp/per month. Plus council tax and other utilities. Is this a reasonable amount of rent to be paying for the salary my husband is making?

I will not be working for at least the first year of us living there. I am pregnant and will be staying with my baby for the first 6-8 months after he/she is born.

Also, does anyone have any average expenses for living in the UK? Groceries or basic bills? Or the cost of milk, eggs, butter and bread for comparison?

Thank you so much for your answers and help!

This is my first baby, but he/she happened to come at horrible timing!

My husband just got a job that is moving us to London in April. My due date isn't until the end of August.

My mother, mother-in-law, and one of my really good friends want to get together and throw a fairly large shower for me around the beginning of March. I will be about 12-14 weeks (depending on the final date they choose)

I feel this is really early since most don't have showers until 28-37 weeks, but if I don't let them plan this shower, I won't get a shower at all and my friend really wants me to have one, (hence why she hooked up with my mom on in law)

The other reason it needs to be done so early is because we have to get our stuff shipped over to London, including anything new for the baby.

Is it bad etiquette to let them plan a shower so early in my pregnancy based on the circumstances?

I have been feeling nauseous, light headed, dizzy, head aches, lower back pain, constantly tired (sleeping 10-15 hours a day), certain foods or smells of foods make me feel sick, and I'm 8 days late.

I have taken both a first response it showed with a white line where the positive line should be and a clear blue digital that said I wasn't pregnant.

Can I be pregnant or is it something else? I go to the doctor in two weeks, but thought I would seek answers from anyone else to see if they had similar problems?

I think I might be pregnant. I am not sure, but I am 7 days late. My last period started on September 19th. I have been feeling extremely nauseated and have had major aversions to the certain foods and smells. I am also very emotional right now. I will cry at the drop of a hat and start yelling at anyone who looks at me funny...

I have taken two tests, one didn't work properly and the 2nd came out with the negative line clear and pink, but where the positive line would have been was white. I researched that, and it is called an evaporation line. I'm going to wait a few more days and try and third test and see if my period may miraculously appear as well.

Other details, I was on the pill from January 2006 until this August 2011. I cam off the pill to get an IUD and changed my mind and my husband decided to go the route of family planning. My period in September was also slightly late and short lived, but it did come.

I'm not sure if this could just be me adjusting back to my body making it's own hormones after 5 and a half years of being on the pill or maybe I have some sort of flu. Any thoughts???

I just found out today that my fiance's aunt and uncle and his parents have gone in together to get us a honeymoon.

My problem is that I am scheduled to work the entire month of August. Which is when the honeymoon is. It's a time share and the dates are set in stone.

My fear is that if I tell my work that I cannot do the times they have scheduled, they won't hire me back in the fall or next summer. (I work as an independent contractor for a children's theatre school).

I haven't officially signed my contract yet, but I have given a verbal agreement. I need to let them know on Friday at the latest if I am going to break this agreement.

I just don't know what to do. If I stay to work, I will not get the honeymoon provided by his family. That will make me feel really guilty because he really wants to go (It's a trip to the Alps in Austria) and I don't want to make his aunt and uncle feel guilty because we don't take the wedding gift they have provided us. His parents are paying for the plane tickets and the time share is coming from the aunt and uncle. So his parents won't be out any money, just his aunt and uncle.

I feel horrible, but at the same time, I don't want to risk my career either.

I don't know what to do!!!! It sucks either way!

I am trying to think of any ideas for our wedding ring engravings. I don't want boring and traditional. But I don't want something completely off the wall either.

I was thinking something funny like:

You're stuck with me

Property of _______

Or something sweet such as:

You gave me the stars...(he really did, desert road no street lights or cars, I have never seen so many stars in my life)

Ring 1:How wonderful life is... Ring 2: ...while your in the world. (quote from our song)

Any opinions or advice???

Thanks!

Okay, so I just want to know what people think. And please be nice. If you aren't, I will report you!

I have a custom made engagement ring that I love. 1.5K color change sapphire in a custom made white gold setting. Here is the link. A Few pictures, sorry some of them are blurry. I'm not a great photographer.

http://picasaweb.google.com/104684072572838960670/...

Here is a picture of my wedding dress and veil. I'm a plus size girl, no rude comments please!!

I want to know what you think of the veil with the dress. There is champagne edging on the veil, but no champagne on the dress. I want to see if you think it looks alright or not. I love both, I just want to know what people think. Champagne is one of my wedding colors. Here is the link:

http://picasaweb.google.com/104684072572838960670/...

Thanks!

We aren't big on dancing in front of people. Do we have to do the traditional dances? I feel really stupid doing as, as does he. We can't dance and can't afford lessons because of the cost of the wedding!

Would it be acceptable to have the option for guests to dance, but not have the traditional first dance, father/daughter and mother/son dances?

Our venue has outdoor and indoor areas. The dance floor is outside on a terrace and the reception dinner and everything will be on the three seasons porch, so I don't think it would be awkward?

Thoughts?

Do I need to send out an invitation for the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner? The majority of our guests for the rehearsal are from out of town. Or is a nice e-mail to everyone acceptable?

How soon should we send out the e-mail or invitations? We are getting married on a Sunday, so our rehearsal is on Friday because of scheduling with our venue. The groomsmen also need to do final tux fittings either Thursday or Friday early afternoon just in case.

Who all needs to be invited to the rehearsal? I know everyone who is involved in the bridal party and parents and grandparents, but I have few that I am unsure about. My fiance's cousin is a groomsman. He is an adult 24 years old, does he come alone or do his parents get invited to the rehearsal as well?

If there are other family members in town by the time the rehearsal dinner comes around, is it appropriate to invite them to the dinner, but not the rehearsal? Too many people as the rehearsal IMO if we invite them to watch?

Also, any other advice would be helpful.

Thanks!

I am working on the registry for the wedding.

Registry etiquette says to have items in various price ranges for everyone to have options and than to have double the items as your have guests. This is kinda hard, because that's like 400 items! I don't want to look greedy or ridiculous for adding items.

I am not expecting anyone to buy me gifts. If they do that's awesome and we would appreciate anything they wish to give us, on our registry or not.

So, with all of that my actual question is:

After you got married, was there anything on your registry that you didn't get? Or wished that you had registered for? Or even bought for yourself after wards that proved to be extremely useful?

I have already asked this questions, but I didn't get many answers, and the answers I did get it was obvious people didn't read my posting. So I would like to try again. Thanks.

I am having second thoughts about bridal attire. I really wish I wasn't, my wedding is in 3 and a half months!!!

I was originally going to have a champagne colored dress, then I found the dress of my dreams in ivory. I love my new dress.

http://www.davidsbridal.com/webapp/wcs/s%E2%80%A6

I had already been gifted with a veil with champagne edging. I love the veil and I want to wear it.This is similar to the veil, but not quite. The veil is a bit longer and the edging is champagne in color. The veil is ivory in color to match my dress, it's more the accent edging I'm concerned about!

http://www.davidsbridal.com/webapp/wcs/s%E2%80%A6

I am looking at these shoes right now, the shoes will be white with champagne ribbon and the crystals.

http://www.weddingsarefun.com/jfbridalcr%E2%80%A6

I am now thinking that the whole idea of mixing the colors of champagne and ivory isn't a good idea. I like it still, but now I am concerned what it will look like in pictures.

My colors are navy blue and champagne, with orange flowers. My flower girl has a mini bridal dress in ivory. She has an ivory headpiece with champagne accents to match my accented veil. I think everything looks pretty, but I am still a bit concerned!!!

I guess it really is just bridal jitters or something, but I would appreciate opinions. Maybe to help ease my anxiety!

I am having second thoughts about bridal attire. I really wish I wasn't, my wedding is in 3 and a half months!!!

I was originally going to have a champagne colored dress, then I found the dress of my dreams in ivory.

http://www.davidsbridal.com/webapp/wcs/stores/serv...

I had already been gifted with a veil with champagne edging. I love the veil and I want to wear it.This is similar to the veil, but not quite. The veil is a bit longer and the edging is champagne in color. The veil is ivory in color to match my dress, it's more the accent edging I'm concerned about!

http://www.davidsbridal.com/webapp/wcs/stores/serv...

I am looking at these shoes right now, the shoes will be white with champagne ribbon and the crystals.

http://www.weddingsarefun.com/jfbridalcrystalwedge...

I am now thinking that the whole idea of mixing the colors of champagne and ivory isn't a good idea. I like it still, but now I am concerned what it will look like in pictures.

My colors are navy blue and champagne, with orange flowers. My flower girl has a mini bridal dress in ivory. She has an ivory headpiece with champagne accents to match my accented veil. I think everything looks pretty, but I am still a bit concerned!!!

I guess it really is just bridal jitters or something, but I would appreciate opinions. Maybe to help ease my anxiety!

My fiance and I have our premarital class on Saturday. It's an all day even from 8-5.

I have had a few people make me nervous about the class. One couple told me that the host of their class made all the couples fight all day long on purpose.

I was just wondering if anyone had any premarital class experiences they would like to share so I have a sense of what to expect.

I am not afraid of this ruining our relationship, I just don't want to fight with him! We have been together for almost five years.

We are taking the class so that my uncle, who is a priest, can perform the ceremony for us.

Serious answers only, and please CATHOLIC premarital class examples. I know they are different than other classes. Thanks

I have heard of the trash the dress idea that brides have started doing. I have even seen pictures of brides swimming in their gowns, rock climbing, and even painting!

I wondering if any brides are doing this?

I have thought about it, but I keep going back and forth. I mean, I doubt my wedding dress with be worn again by a child of mine. If my children are anything like me, they will want their own dresses, my fiance and I aren't incredibly religious, so we won't use the material for christening gowns, I have thought about gown preservation, but it seems like a waste of money. The only other option is reselling my dress, but I like that idea even less than preserving. I don't want other people wearing my dress. I guess I would rather do a trash the dress photo session and then get it cleaned and preserved and have fantastic memories.

I just want to know if anyone has thought about it, even if they aren't doing it and what they thought about the trash the dress sessions.

Any one have opinions?

My maid of honor and my mother are planning my bridal shower. I know the tradition says my mom shouldn't be involved and everything, but my maid of honor is in her last semester of college and very busy. On top of that, she doesn't make very much money. She has been a maid of honor several times before and every time, the mother of the bride planned the shower and not her. So she is looking forward to being able to plan this one.

My mother is only helping in terms of food and location. She works at the church preschool and was able to reserve the hall for the shower. She is also talking to some of the ladies from church about the meal and set up. Other than making sure my maid of honor has everyone on the guest list, she really isn't doing anything else.

I am honestly worried about the financial issue. My maid of honor can't really afford to do more than the invitations. My mom is already paying for a big portion of the wedding and my dad just had surgery and I know there is financial strain there.

I have tried calling my mom and my maid of honor and trying to convince them to let me help, at least financially. But they both keep telling me I know too much already and I'm the bride and can't plan my own shower. I am not wanting to plan my own shower, but I don't want them to spend money they don't have. They are both already putting a lot into the wedding for me in terms of the wedding reception and buying clothes, and my maid of honor is planning a combined bachelor/bachelorette party. It just seems unfair.

Cancelling is out of the question. My maid of honor really wants to do this. As I said, she has never gotten to opportunity.

My question is should I just let them keep planning and paying for things without my help? Or should I at least let my maid of honor know that if she needs any money for help for the shower or the party that she can ask? (I know my mom won't listen or accept money from me) I just don't want either of them spending more than they had already said they would spend. What should I do!?

Only nice answers please! I am concerned for my friends and family here!

I am wanting find find something for my wedding night. I am having A LOT of trouble though. I am wanting to find something to wear that isn't slutty or makes me look like a porn star. I want something alluring and sexy without going over the top. I really want to find a chemise in white, black, blue or purple. I can't find anything that fits my criteria.

The other problem is that I am more of a plus size girl and I carry most of the weight in my hip area. I want to find something that still will make my fiance turn heads on our wedding night.

I found a cute bra and panty set, but it isn't quite what I am looking for unless I can find a sheer black robe to go with it or something. I don't want to spend more than $60 either if I can help it.

Here is the link to the bra, but there is an image with the set on the same page. http://cacique.lanebryant.com/pleated-bandeau-bra/...

Also, please answer nicely. I don't want or need rude comments. This is important to me. Our wedding night is the only honeymoon we are going to get because of our jobs and I want to make it special. Thanks

Who all should be getting a tip on the day of the wedding???

I don't have a DJ, a friend of mine is doing the music for me and we bought him a gift already.

My location is a flat rate for servers and the bartenders and everything and the tip for them is a combined 18% tip for all the people for my location.

We don't have a limo or carriage driver or anything like that.

MY wedding planner is a friend of the family and we also got her a gift.

My florist isn't delivering, we are picking up the flowers ourselves and storing them for a day and doing our own centerpieces because they are closed on the day of my wedding.

My cake delivery is also coming the day before because it too, is closed on the day of my wedding. We are having to stack and finish decorating the cake ourselves.

My officiant is my uncle, and we are have got him a gift instead of money since it is a family member.

Do I need to tip my photographer?

Have I followed through with appropriate etiquette and should I tip my photographer and did I leave out anyone important?

Thanks!

I have a huge problem that me, my fiance and my parents have no idea how to solve.

My grandparents on my dad side of the family are refusing to attend my wedding because I am not inviting my uncle (their oldest son, my dad's brother).

The reason I am not inviting my uncle to the wedding is because my uncle tried to get me to sleep with him when I was 19 years old. He didn't think it was wrong because technically we aren't blood related. (My dad is technically my step dad, even though he has been in my life since I was six months old. My biological father signed away his parental rights right after I was born. So, I don't consider him family at all. My step dad is my true dad.) So, my uncle didn't think there was an issue with trying to get his niece who isn't related to him by blood, who is also of legal age to sleep with him.

I told my parents the day after this happened. They approached my uncle and he denied any such occurrence. This was almost five years ago now.

Fast forward to present date, my grandmother realizes my uncle is not on my guest list and tell my grandfather. He proceeds to tell my father that they are not coming unless I invite my uncle. They believed I wasn't invited him because he just divorced my aunt after a nasty affair he had and immediately got married and they though I was holding a grudge. My father said I wasn't (I'm not, I like my uncle's new wife, I kind of want to tell her what he did because she has a daughter my age though!!!!) My father told them what my uncle did.

The end result was my grandparents saying that my uncle is their son and they will support him no matter what and if I don't invite him then they are not coming to my wedding. I am the oldest grandchild, the first to get married, and one of only two girls. It's important to me that they come, but I DO NOT want the man who is supposedly family, but tried to get me to have sex with him there on the most important day of my life.

Is there anything that I can do to ease things over with my grandparents without causing even more family drama? I don't want any of this to ruin the big day for me and my fiance.

Please only serious answers. This is a very serious and sensitive topic for me and my family and we are running out of options!!!

Does anyone have an unusual or uncommon engagement ring?

I have a karat and a half color changing sapphire. It's rare and beautiful. I love it, but most of the time people don't know I am engaged because it isn't the traditional diamond. I just had the stone reset, and I am hoping the band with a little more formality and height will help it look more like an engagement ring.

It's kind of upsetting when people don't recognize the symbol of an engagement ring just because it isn't a diamond. It's even worse to be leered at or hit on in front of your fiance because it goes undetected.

I just wanted to know if anyone else had an nontraditional engagement ring or have dealt with similar problems.

Please, serious answers only. I'm just curious so don't make any comments that are rude or unnecessary. Thanks

I know most people pay the officiant a fee of some sort.

My dilemma is that my officiant is my Uncle. He is an Episcopalian priest and is going to marry us. I want to get him a gift of some sort. Money is awkward because he is family and doing it for me and my family, not because we interviewed and and decided he was the best.

I'm not incredibly close to my uncle, but I am closer to him than my other uncles. I just want to get him something that I know he will appreciate. I don't want to get him trinkets or anything, he and my aunt live in a small apartment and don't have much room for extra stuff.

I was thinking an engraved pocket watch would be nice, but I'm not even sure if he would use it. Any ideas would be helpful I want it to be meaningful and show how much I appreciate him for doing our wedding ceremony. It means a lot to me because he is family and not a stranger.

Helpful answers only, don't be mean!