Grandparents refuse to attend wedding! (Slightly graphic, please be considerate!)?

thing is YOU have issued an invitation to you grandparents & if they choose not to attend for whatever reason knowing that you would really like them to attend - then I feel they do not have YOUR best interests at heart.

If that is the attitude they are taking - do you really want them attending your celebration??

I experienced something similar many years ago when my sister got married. Our mother had died as a result of a car accident about 10 years prior to my sisters wedding & our grandmother ( who had subsequently raised us) was refusing to attend if our father attended & took his then current lady along with him. ( this grandmother was our mothers mother) she also did not attend my ( very small - family only) wedding 16months later.

Much as it will be sad for you if your grandparents do not attend - DO NOT bow to pressure & invite your uncle.

You will have your parents there so be happy for that & if your grandparents go with their decision not to attend - just tell them "" Ok that is your decision & we will miss you being part of our celebration""

really there is not anything else you can do

I would sit down with my grandparents and tell them that you are not comfortable having your uncle at the wedding but don't wish to elaborate. Let them know that you don't have a grudge against him (You could even invite your aunt that just got divorced and uncle's new wife and daughter to show there's no hard feelings towards anyone) and tell them how important it is to you for them to be there. This should be a serious sit down talk with you, your fiance and your grandparents. This is a really tough situation and I'm sorry that your happy day is being ruined by family drama when it's your day and not any of their business. But if your grandparents don't want to budge, don't give in.

BTW, I'd tell your uncles new wife (after the wedding probably) about it because you don't want the same thing to happen to her daughter.

Good luck & Happy Wedding :)

The fact that your grandmother is taking this stance

shows she supports him, and not you

that in itself would be all i needed

sure i would be so upset that A-she had taken his side, & B-she wouldn't be at my wedding

but, i would take the opportunity to show not only the uncle, your grandparents, & the rest of the family that you are grown, grown up, & over what has happened, and you have taken control of your own life as an adult

Its so sad when something like this gets in the way fo family life

but life isn't a fairytale

bottom line here

you either

go back on your own principles (which i agree with you 100%), and you invite the uncle, and there for grandparents will come

or

take a big deep breath, enjoy your wedding day, with only those who support you around you and begin this next, new & exciting chapter of your life

sorry i cant wave a magic wand and tell you how to have it all, life doesn't work like that

being a grown up sucks sometimes lol

but it also means that YOU are in charge of your own destiny

good luck

& congratulations

I would try one last time to talk to your grandparents about how much it means to have them there and if it doesn't work, I would try to put it aside, but not let it ruin your relationship with them, though I know that's hard.

I was my granddad's ONLY granddaughter (he remarried -- she has three granddaughters, but it's not the same). I was the only daughter of his only daughter -- my mom was deceased by the time I got married, too. They didn't attend my wedding. Why? They already had their tickets, etc. to visit my mom's stepsister halfway across the country from where I lived and they weren't going to cancel on her. I was very sad for a while, but I forgave them because I still wanted a relationship with my beloved granddad (and with step-grandmother, too, but that was a secondary issue).

I admit I was somewhat saddened getting ready for my wedding, because not only had my mom died, but most of her side of the family -- the grandparents and my cousins and their families -- weren't coming. I wasn't as upset with my cousins because all three of their wives were 6-8 months pregnant at the time, but I missed them. Yet not, because I had a very happy day and my aunt and uncle and a lot of my dad's side were there, as well as some dear friends.

My granddad would be almost 99 years old now (he died at 94) and I'm very glad I didn't get mad and maintained a nice relationship with them over the years. I still think it was a stupid reason for missing my wedding, but I agreed to disagree and am very glad I did.

This is an area where the Watchtower corporation allows its followers to exercise their consciences. So, a Witness may attend a wedding in a church without fear of punishment by the elders. But a Witness may feel uncomfortable about doing so. One reason is that many Witnesses are very image-conscious. Especially Witnesses who have positions in the congregation or are seeking such positions (elder, ministerial servant, pioneer, etc.). The Witness may be afraid that others in the congregation will find out and view him/her as "spiritually weak." Many Witnesses are similar to the "church lady" on the old Saturday Night Live sketches. They can be quite gossipy and passive-aggressive...just like members of other religions. Just another example how the JWs are just like everybody else...

It is your wedding and you need to enjoy the happiest day of your life.If your grandparents do not want to accept your reasons for not inviting this uncle then that is their issue to deal with and not yours. It sounds like you have very supportive parents and you should be very thankful for that. I would suggest that you ask your grandparents to reconsider their decision but if that if they decide not to attend your wedding that you will miss them.

With grandparents with an attitude like that, do you really want them there?

This is YOUR wedding, not theirs and you have to explain your situation again and if it doesn't work, then you'll have your wedding without your grandparents and it can be their problem, but try your best not to worry about it, you have enough stress coming up to the big day. Relax and who knows? maybe they will come after all, they could be bluffing.

Well I think the best thing you can do is talk to your grandparents and tell them how uncomfortable it would be for you to have your uncle there but that it would mean a lot to you if they were there, and that you don't want the family drama but you don't want your uncle to be there.

You're in the right. Let them not attend. The most you can do is level with your grandparents and then leave the ball in their court. Clearly their priority is him over you. Your wedding day should be perfect, but having your uncle there would be far worse than having your grandparents absent. I think you're doing the right thing, and if your grandparents make the call not to go, it's their loss.

Honestly, it sounds like you've done all that you can do. It's your grandparents who are being unreasonable, and you are under no obligation to invite anyone, especially someone who has mistreated you. If they don't come to their senses, then they're just stubborn and selfish, and you aren't missing much by having two less people of extremely weak character knocked off the guest list.