my husband left me and our son for another woman?

I'm sorry this is happening to you. It sounds like you have your hands full with this one. I'm not sure WHY you still want him, but since you do, there is only one solution to your problem. You have to make him do all the work... BY DOING ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. No money (he must not have any respect for you at all if he left you and then asked you for money.) No communication. NOTHING. When you see him... look right through him as though you can take him or leave him. Always be the one to end a conversation first, and make him call AT LEAST three times before you answer. He's the one who left. People value what they have to WORK for. How's he going to chase you and work for you if he DOESN'T HAVE TO???

The solution is to begin serious work on yourself... your appearance, your education, your home, your other relationships and, most of all, your self esteem. Begin to lay groundwork to have a really good man in your life. (After all... what good man wants another man's doormat?) If he wants the job, then he'll do whatever it takes to get you back. If he doesn't, you've made room for someone better and you're no worse off than you are now. It's a win/ win. Good luck!

Well, first of all I am sorry. This is definately a difficult situation for you to be in and everyone can totally understand that. Your brain maybe telling you one thing and your heart another. I guess your pain at this moment is your own and try your best not to influence this pain to your son in any way. Rise above the situation. You at the moment it seems wont have much to do with your husband or this new woman therefore why pressurize yourself by personalizing it. Be detached and tell your son, he can see her later. For you forgiving your husband should be the first priority irrespective of how much you are hurt by this. Forgiveness will FOREMOST free you then anyone else. All the best. Even though you claim to be an atheist but may God still give you the patience and Love to rise above this.

Oh Hannah, I am so very sorry. I too had a husband walk out on me and my little boy. I know you are devastated, and scared, and worried and probably thinking you did something that made you unlovable. I am here to tell you, you are a lot stronger than you think you are. You WILL find that you are happier in the long run. Any man that would have so little regard for his wife and child is NOT worthy of your love.

You will survive!

You will be happy!

You will find love and joy again!

You are the most important person in your child's life, remember that.

Everything Changes and ends.

Plans don't Always work out.

Pain is a part of living.

Life goes on and good comes around again.

Best of Luck.

He is worthless. You do not want him back. Let his new woman support him.

You have a son to take care of and you don't have the money to give your cheating husband.

I bet if you think about it, he says he loves you every time he wants something and when he gets what he wants he is done with you. Do not let him use you like that.

By the way, get a divorce and make him pay child support through the courts so if he don't pay they will throw his butt in jail. And go for sole custody too.

You won't always feel that way about him. there will come a time when you open your eyes and see him for the jerk he really is. Don't call his new love anymore. You will be getting even with her by letting her have him. He will cheat on her too.

There are better men out there.

First of all, DO NOT GIVE HIM MONEY (unless you're that naive?). You are under no obligation to help him financially - never were. He's an adult, and as such he needs to take care of his own stuff. I'm sure you have your own responsibilities to meet.

I'm really sorry you're going through this.. you trusted him, it seems, and he let you down. I know it's very painful for you.

And i realize you can't just fall out of love.

My advice is to get involved in things you like to do.. take up a hobby (scrapbooking, going to the gym, walking for exercise, joining a card club, take a class such as karate). Depend on the people who love you for support and company when you can.

Your husband seems confused, and as if he's going through some sort of mid-life crisis (hence, the other woman). If i were in your position, i wouldn't take him back or help him out in any way. He made his bed, now he gets to lay in it.

As for the other woman, i would ignore her, and leave her alone. There is no sense calling her. If it weren't her, it would be someone else. It's YOUR HUSBAND's fault this happened, not hers.

If you are not able to cope, please consider talking to a therapist or even your doctor for help and advice. We can move forward. The grieving process takes time. And this guy doesn't deserve you, anyway

How old are you and how and why did you develop such poor taste in men? Part of it is your fault for having a kid with this idiot, the bigger part of your failure is knowing that he's a moron, that he left you, turned your kid, fatherless, and the fact that even though he's with another woman, that YOU STILL WANT HIM BACK...... I mean how much punishment do you want out in life? Do you enjoy being treated like a second class person?

Here's the thing, IN america there's 300 MILLION PEOPLE, half of which are men, and half of that, albeit are single. That leaves you with 75 other million candidates. Why in the world would you think this loser is the best thing you can possibly have? Let things go, go out, get an education, go better yourself, go find a new man, and go on with your life. And the next time you decide to have a kid, don't go having sex with Losers.

DO NOT lend him any money while you're still married, and even then not without a written contract. If he's the type to leave you and then toy with both women's emotions, and destroy your son's family life for his own selfish whims, do you expect that he'll honor any commitment to repay you? You'll never see that money again. If he can't pay his own bills, he can't make child support, so keep your money for yourself and your son. And don't bother with this other woman. If she continues the affair after learning about his marital status, then that tells you all you need to know about her character.

OMG Don't give him money!.......Let her pay for his sorry @ss. They made their bed, let them lie in it.

You need to focus on you and your son. If he isn't working he can't contribute to your child, so you need to count your pennies for a while.

Don't worry about the other woman's nastiness. Your husband probably fed her full of lies about you and your marriage.or she's a spiteful b*tch.Either way let her have and support him.

EDIT I think you need to set strict boundaries for when he visits. This will protect you from being used financially as well as emotionally.

Tell him if the visits do not remain about your child and your child only he will be asked to leave.

Love is no substitute for stupidity. But don't let us stop you, give him all the money you can come up with, i'm certain the other woman is going to enjoy spending it. It's unfortunate but I can tell in your words that you're going to give him the money anyways. But just so you know, that won't bring him back.

Keep your money, he will not pay you back and is just using you; you need it for your child who should come first. He is a grown man and needs to act like one. Get a divorce and leave him to his other woman. They deserve each other, and you deserve better.