Need help coping with the lose of a 20 yr old Grandson?

I wish I had an answer for you. Unfortunately, this is so far beyond medical research. I can tell you that I have witnessed a great deal of unexpected and unexplained death in my life, and it is a process. You have to deal with not only your own grief, but your son's grief and all other family members, as well. It will NOT be easy, but you WILL be ok. You will never be the same, but hopefully, you can find a way to find peace within your family, and in the future use that to speak to others when they have similar experiences. I don't know how to say what I want to say.... it is hard to relate because so few understand that kind of pain. Take your time... cry your tears, you have to. But know that life will go on. He is not gone, just out of reach.

From a medical perspective.... it is absolutely reasonable that you might need pharmacological help to sleep at night, or to even force yourself to eat. The brain has a tendency to shut down when it is overloaded, and sometimes we forget to do what it takes to keep us moving. Contact your provider, and let them know what is going on. I would recommend an SSRI, like lexapro, paxil, celexa, prozac, etc. .... just so you can cope. You need somthing because you are hurting, and also watching those you love hurt, as well. This is a horrible position for you, and you will need the help! I hope this helps, and I hurt for you. If you need anything, I think you can get my email off of here.

Wow, momw, I'm so sorry for your loss. I don't know if you're religious, but I'll be praying for you and your family. Other than that, the only help I can offer is that right now it's okay to hurt for your grandson because that hurt means that you love him.

I'm also very sorry that the top two answers have absolutely nothing to do with your question. These people are obviously being very insensitive about your situation.

I had a close friend who lost a son at around the same age.

At first, you are bound to be overwhelmed and paralysed by grief. Later, all I can suggest is for each of you to focus on the people remaining in your lives, and what you mean to each other, and keep going for their sake.

For the rest, I can only agree with what Viva says.

I'm very sorry for your loss. Just know that God sometimes works in mysterious ways. Your grandson is with Him now, and he is in a better place. You can shed your tears today, and grieve today, but tomorrow you have to move on and accept it. I'm not saying to forget your grandson, but you shouldn't cry yourself into depression. I'm praying for you.