I feel like an old fart with a wasted life at age 26...?

Life is complicated and requires effort as an individual to do ones best - good luck at 31, this might change!

Laughter really is the best medicine. Just having a good time or seeing someone smile can actually make your day and give you hope..you don't have to be in the perfect situation just yet..just try and enjoy the ride..

I'm sort of going through similar thoughts to yours. I'm 21, have never had a romantic relationship, don't know what i'm going to do after my degree...etc etc....for the past couple of months i'm always thinking about death and how time goes so quickly and how getting old is so scary and how life is so confusing...blah blah...i admit it does get depressing at times.., but i still have some optimism about me and know that there must be a purpose for everyone on this earth. We're not meant to know..we're just meant to live.

I'm reading 'the secret' at the moment and let me tell you.. this book makes you realise humans are very special and powerful beings..we have the power to create whatever we want.

Good luck.

p.s. being in a drunken state only takes the control away from yourself. If you let something else control your mind and actions...bit like a puppet on a string..i believe you are putting faith into something else controlling you, and that's fake because it wares off after a while, and you get even more depressed and have no faith in yourself...

so stay focused!!

wow You never know what's around the corner .You must be reasonably fit with being in the Marines and you must've had a lot of interest in your life with being part of them or perhaps you saw some terrible things in life that has left you depressed and need to see a councillor. Suicide is not cowardly it is Absolutely selfish to burden your family for the rest of their lives with the unhappiness of what went wrong?How could they have helped? etc. Have you saved any money . Why not go to Australia or europe for a while backpacking around and meeting up with interesting people. How would you know your future. It may involve meeting someone to share your life with someone who you can both create happiness , children or many other things. There are plenty of options , you are just not seeing them at the moment. life changes all the time and in the long term even those dark days can be a great learning experience.

This isn't really a question but a cri du coeur from someone who feels lost. However, ask yourself what it is you would really most like to do. Then try to figure out a way to do it. You're young, you have served your country--more than many do--and you have the right to a decent life. All forms of work are admirable.

I want to be sympathetic, but I don't think killing yourself is right, from any perspective. Please do not do this--an injustice to yourself and others.

I don't know where you are in the country, but California is very beautiful. It's worthwhile seeing it and even trying to live there. However, that's just what I'd do. The woods on the west coast are like heaven.

However, many lives and careers can be fulfilling. I'm in one--I like my job. Wish it paid more, but still--

What is the most pleasurable, non self-destructive thing you can imagine? Go for it?

I'm not a psychologist or an expert in any mental health sense. You probably could benefit from someone more adept than I.

I think you will be fine. Just going though adjusting to being back and everything. Got to just get out there and meet new people and do new things you never did before, basically just follow your excitement..any little thing..not just the big things. The reason people usually hate school like that is because we were never taught how to study, how to learn. Just were told to learn it. But there are simple things like just looking up a word..then getting it! Anyway, don't get into the I am going to kill myself thing. That is depression coming on and it is really a bummer. Don't go there. Find places to go..meet some new people. Start dating again..stay away from the booze! Keep yourself straight, it only makes you get depressed thoughts going. My God, you just came back from a war honey..you got to take good care of yourself. Go work out, get a massage, go to the beach, go fun places, do all the good stuff now. Let it all go and create the life your prefer. Thank you too! Hugs!!

If 'serving' had meaning to you, perhaps rather than the 'me me me me' game (most often depressing!) you might try volunteering some time to hospice care? To visiting those with no visitors in the hospital or nursing care facility?

You get the idea? Many people find great joy and meaning, and a cure for the 'me me me me blues', when we focus a bit on 'others'.

Such service can counteract the brainwashing that you received as a soldier! Rather than 'dehumanizing others' , you can find your way back into hunmanity!

Just to give you some perspective, I am 41. The way I see it, I have at least one more of my entire life ahead of me. And, as I tell my kids- boredom is a choice that you make. As a soldier, you know how to get a job done, so consider finding something useful to do your next assignment. Volunteering is a good idea. Also- I don't know where you are, but you could get on with the fire crews on the west coast. THAT would make things interesting for you. Plenty of forest fires to keep you busy.

Now get to it.

Life is only boring if you allow it to be, if you want more excitement in your life don't wait for it to come to you, go after it on your own initiative.

Also, most means of suicide result in a big mess with all the limbs everywhere and the puddle of blood and all, I mean, think about the people who gotta clean up too.

This life is not one that you chose of your volition. You never intended to be born of the particular parents and your parents also did not think of begetting the particular person , that is yourself .This is purely something that was neither under your choice or that of your parents .the one who tossed you into the field knows what to do with you. Just as your advent was not of your choice , so should your departure be (not of your choice ) .The life we have now is one that is very precious as ,no one can aspire to be born again as their same self again to any parents or in any society of his /her choice ,as birth is and would never be, under the option of anybody..

The depression you feel ,is due to the fact that you have not created any purpose for yourself and you are just like a dry leaf that has fallen in the rain waters that carry it away in its own course . You are directionless.

If you create a purpose for your self , and seriously and proudly take to its perfect execution, you will be fully occupied with it and will find the task interesting and the time you have , even insufficient to complete your responsibilities .If you are unmarried , you may try to provide your parents and siblings with the comforts and love that they showered on you , You will be repaying your debts to them.and it is a duty that every one owes to his parents and siblings

. If you marry a woman that loves you for what you are , you will find your life very satisfying and interesting and find yourself fully occupied to your satisfaction. Marry the one that loves you and not the one you love if you want to be happy in life .Strong Attachment is the main reason for all problems in life . Now time is hanging upon your heavily with no purpose .So create a purpose and try to accomplish it before you breath your last . Time lost can never be got back .Nothing in this world moves backward and everything moves forward and nothing retraces its steps . You be part of this grand scheme of life and perform your part of the task before you become too old to do anything, of your own.

Nothing is unimportant in this life and society.Every wheel and every screw in any mechanism is as important as anything else in it, as the lack of any one screw or the fault in anyone wheel would render the whole mechanism useless.. I remember people saying something like this " .A shoe is lost, for .want of a nail .A horse is lost for want of shoe. A soldier is lost for want of a horse and a battle is lost for want of a soldier "

So , no one is unimportant in this society and every one has to be made more efficient by teaching them the importance of their role in this Society ,. Religions should teach this , the way of peaceful and interesting life instead of sowing the seeds of hatred and interference in the life of people

Read Bhagavad -Gita to understand the right way of life . One does not have to be a Hindu for this or take to Hindu religion.The westerners wear pants . . They are mostly Christians . The Hindus who are used to loin clothes have started wearing pants.That does not mean that they have embraced Christianity Muslims who mostly wear lungies ,also wear pants .That has nothing to do with religion.So reading Bhagavad -gita has nothing to do with the Hindu religion.or converting to it .

But it will give you the knowledge about the meaning and purpose of this life and the manner of discharge of your duties to the society you belong .

Who is responsible to create such stumbling block to your moral, intellectual and spiritual growth. Request him to guide you in right direction. Or you try to change your mentor.